Warriors #4: Darkness Awakens

Chapter 20

Goldenshine's POV

I stared down at my sleeping son as rain began to pour down outside.

After Thornclaw had been taken to the medicine den, most cats in ThunderClan had attempted to begin their normal duties of the day, despite one of their Clanmates possibly dying just foxlengths away.

I could tell it was difficult for everyone, though. Thornclaw was highly respected in ThunderClan as one of its senior warriors. He was strong, determined and defiant. I had always been proud to call him my father.

I, personally, was having a very hard time, as expected. I was also incredibly confused.

I didn't understand how Thornclaw had even gotten these wounds he had in the first place, or how he could have been injured to the point of possibly going to StarClan.

My mind had been spiraling like crazy since first laying eyes on my dying father. I didn't think I'd be able to think about anything else until I was told that he'd be okay.

Did he maybe go out into the forest for a walk last night, get attacked, and then attempt to return to his nest and sleep it off? I wondered. I don't understand how no cat saw this coming...

As I was thinking, I felt Swiftkit squirm against my flank, and I looked down to see that he was awake, staring out into the camp that was being covered with raindrops. Cats traveling through camp cringed as they got more and more soaked and squinted their eyes against the water pelting at them.

Swiftkit, who was watching this, suddenly let out a very shaky sigh and set his head back down in our nest. I was reminded of how distressed he had seemed since Thornclaw had been in the medicine den.

He hadn't said one word at all since he had hissed at me to not carry him. He didn't seem to want to look any cat in the eye, and he looked down to the ground everywhere he went.

Poor darling, I thought to myself. This must be affecting him more than I realize.

I ran my tail along his flank and touched my nose to his ear. "Are you worried about Thornclaw?" I whispered to him.

To my surprise, Swiftkit didn't pull away from me at all. He simply met my gaze with his big gray eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I really am," he murmured as his eyes clouded with guilt.

Why would he feel guilty about this? I wondered. I hope he's not blaming himself. There is literally no way that this is his fault.

For some reason though, as I looked at Swiftkit's strong sorrowful gaze, I began to doubt that. I felt a wave of fear run through me, but I immediately tried to shake it off. Great StarClan, how stupid am I? Swiftkit may be a little snappy, but I would never be able to comprehend any situation that would make what has happened his fault.

Before I could analyze the look in Swiftkit's eyes any longer, he let out a long sigh and turned to look out into ThunderClan camp again, not saying anything more.

My gaze went down to my son's flank, which was beginning to look as if there had never been any wounds to begin with.

Thanks to Jayfeather! I thought. As I always say, he's a prickly little furball, but he's a brilliant medicine cat. Swiftkit is pretty much all better!

I shook my head quickly as Swiftkit suddenly mewed, "Goldenshine?"

"Yes?" I answered back, tilting my head. What could this be about? I haven't done many of these deep, intellectual mother-son talks yet...

As I stared at Swiftkit, I saw him open his mouth, as if about to say something, before closing it again, hissing and shaking his head.

Then he finally spoke, still not facing me, "Has there ever been a choice you've made that you regretted so much, that you wish you could go back in time and undo it?"