cool » l. hemmings

xxv.

I desperately knocked on Michelle's door, hoping she would answer.

"Michelle! Okay, I'm back, and please don't be mad. I'm sorry," I rushed immediately after her face became fully visible when she opened the door. I bounced on the tip of my feet anxiously.

She stood there just looking at me. And I felt so bad and all I wanted to do was hug her and tell her I'm sorry for even existing. "What are you doing?"

"Well, I'm standing in the freezing rain trying to figure out why my friend is being mean to me," I laughed quietly, looking up at the sky just as a raindrop fell on my eye and caused me to flinch.

Michelle grabbed my wrist, making me jump, and pulled me inside. "You should know that already," she said, closing the door.

"I don't," I told her.

Her head tilted up to look at me. "You think it's alright to just waltz into my life and be some adorable idiot?"

I didn't know how to respond. How do I answer something like that? I don't think I can. "I mean...I guess not," my eyes shifted to look at the floor.

"I don't think so either."

"So you're mad at me because you find me adorable?" An unsure smirk found its way on my lips. I find you frustratingly adorable, too, I wanted to tell her.

"Yes." I internally laughed at how simple she made it all sound. Meanwhile I was beating myself up over this and she just wanted to beat me up for her liking me, too. I guess I was okay with that.

"I'm sorry." I've said that a lot today.

"Stop saying that," Michelle told me, probably noticing how much I've said it to her lately.

"I'm--"

"Luke!"

"So--"

"I swear to God." Even though she tried to hide it, I could hear the smallest hidden laugh.

"Okay, okay! God, you're moody."

"It's your fault."

"I didn't do anything," I whined. We were still standing by her front door, just bickering for no reason. At least she wasn't kicking me out, or just kicking me. But I can't say that she won't. I hope not.

"Your feelings are weird and they make mine weird," Michelle sighed, I watched her intently. "I mean, I guess I kind of like it, though." I caught her smile, and she leaned against the door.

I walked over and smiled to her. "I like it, too."

"I don't think you should," her voice was quiet.

"Why not?" My eyebrows furrowed and I titled my head, questioning her.

"A girl named Brooke exists," her eyes rolled, Brooke's name rolling off her tongue as if it were evil. Which, to Michelle, I guess she was.

I shook my head. "That shouldn't matter."

"To me it does."

I wanted to just go for it, just force her to actualy admit whatever feelings she was failing to not show. She was standing perfectly still and I just stared at her in complete silence. I didn't really care about the fact that if I did it, it would definitely come back to bite me in the ass.

"What are you doing?"

"I don't know, your face is fun to look at. Do you think I could call you Mood Swing Michelle?" I joked, hoping she wasn't still a little on edge despite the laughs going on.