Her Vocation

21. Aasiya

I had dropped down to my knees. My voice was breaking with tears and I was crying through hiccups while gazing up at her, whose eyes were devoid of all warmth and held nothing but contempt.

"All my life—I have never asked you for anything—No matter what you said, I have done everything you've ever asked me to do—Never once, have I complained to you about anything—You were absent my whole life—Whenever, I needed someone to guide me or help me through the hurdles of life, I never once found you there to help me—but—but please—just this once—please— I am here, on my knees begging you—I am your daughter—Your flesh and blood, for God's sake—! I have no one else to turn to for help—You're my mother—if you won't help me—then where else would I go—Please—! Please Mom—Don't make me marry Navi—" My vision had become blurry but the tears were nowhere near ending. Yet, I continued to clutch my hands infront of her, in hopes, that her cold heart would melt out of a mother's mercy. Praying that for once, my Mother would help me—The one person who's love is supposed to be unconditional and irrational would maybe save me from the ill fate that I was being cast towards.

However, I couldn't have been further from the truth. My sobs and pleas had gone unrecognised. Instead, a sharp resounding slap violently struck across my face, knocking me off of my knees.

"You ungrateful brat! What the hell have you ever done for us—! We gave you everything that we had only for you to bring us shame after shame?!" She screamed and roughly pulled me to her face by grabbing at my hair.

"You think anyone else would marry damage goods like you—?! HAH! Instead of being grateful to us—that's how you decide to repay us—?!!" Another slap sent me crashing to the carpeted floor of my room.

"What? I have been absent your whole life?!" Her screech had numbed all my senses and the tears had finally ceased to flow. My lips quivered at her coldness and once again, I only felt immense hatred at my own simplicity.

"If you'd ever tried to be half the daughter that Faiza were—We wouldn't have to be sending you away in such a shameful manner—!" I whimpered at her words as she pulled me up by my hair once again, to meet her gaze.

"The least that a failure of a child like you can do for us is get married and get the hell out of our damn lives—! Got it?!" Another thwack struck across my cheeks and this time I didn't try to hold in the tears. She had once again turned her back to me and was on the door when I called out to her. One last time.

"This was the final time, I asked for your help—Next time, if you ever see me, it will be after I am dead—" My voice trembled and my whole body shook with shudders. Yet, my gaze watching her cold and unforgiving back was resolute, which she never turned to see.

"You were no good to us alive—what good could you be dead—" Her voice was detached and without any emotion. No matter how much I was hateful to her, still listening to these words from her mouth; broke the last thread of hope in my pathetic existence .

"The molvi sahab will be here in an hour—and if I don't see you dressed—I swear to God, Aasiya—" Without finishing she left my room, locking it behind her.

A sudden nudge woke me up and I sharply turned to the woman sitting beside me with a gasp. I couldn't understand what she was saying but it seemed like the bus had come to a stop.

"Chai—!" The only word I could comprehend throughout her unfamiliar language. Glancing at the Quran clutched to my chest, I gave her a slight nod. Her face was covered with a Chadar, in a niqab; similar to mine. That's why I couldn't see her smile but I could sense it through the scrunched corners of her eyes. I watched her get up and leave the bus.