Safe // Cam_Dallas

Not Always

I walked to my room and flicked on the light.

What was I actually expecting? Did I want him to kiss me? I shook off the thought and looked at the big bed. 

I was drained. I was tired and all I wanted to do was go to sleep. So that's what I did.

I turned off the light and carefully walked to the bed. I got in and wrapped myself into the covers. I slowly felt my eyelids get heavier and heavier and drifted to sleep. 

I was having a really bad dream. I was trying to escape while I had to leave my Dad behind. I was crying and screaming while I was getting dragged to a safe place. 

 '(Y/N), wake up it's just a bad dream.' I heard a voice tell me.

I opened my eyes and felt sweat drip down my forehead.

I wasn't laying under the covers anymore and was faced with Cameron who sat on his knees next to the bed.

I was panicking and sat up straight away. I looked at his face that was lit up by the little lamp on the night stand. I was breathing heavy and looked at Cameron.

 'Take a deep breath. I'm here, you are safe. It was just a bad dream. You're fine.' He told me and stroke my hand with his thumb.

I sat back against the wall with my back and tried to steady my breath. 

'I have bad dreams very often. I know how you feel. It feels like you are trapped in some kind of reality and it feels so real that you actually feel like you have been running and screaming. I heard you scream so I ran over and woke you up.' He told me softly. 

 I nodded. 'I had to leave my Dad behind and.. And I was scared and no one was there to help my Dad. I was so scared.' A tear ran down my cheek.

Cameron stood up and walked to the otherside of the bed. He got in and got closer to me. 

 He pulled me in for a hug and held me tight. 

'Heey, your Dad will be fine and you are safe here. I won't ever let anything bad happen to you as long as you are here. Your Dad is safe, this all will be over in no time.' He told me and rested his chin softly on the top of my head. I softly sobbed into his chest. 

 'Thank you for making me feel safe while I'm just a pain in the ass.' I sobbed. 

 He chuckled.

 'You're not always a pain in the ass. Don't take it so hard on yourself.' He told me and stroked my back softly. 

 'Why would you have bad dreams?' I asked him after I stopped crying and looked up at him. 

 'I'm always scared that something bad will happen to the people I love and care about. There aren't many people I really care about because most people will be around me for money. I know who my true friends are and my family is the most important thing in the world.' He told me in all honest. 

'But why are you always working then?' I asked him, maybe it was too risky but I had to ask him. 

'People always expected me to be perfect and I do my best to make that come true. I work my ass off to make sure my mother and sister can have a good life. I work my ass off so I can full fill the picture of being perfect. People would always tell me about that picture and they always pushed me to be perfect and maybe I went too far but I actually am that picture now. So many people see me as that perfect picture and that was all they ever told me to be.' He explained. 

 'But why would you want to be perfect if you are not even enjoying being you or even enjoy your life? What's the point in that?' I asked him carefully. 'What does it give you to be the perfect one?' 

 'I finally got to be the best in what I do. I finally got to be the one my Dad wanted me to be. I finally got to be the one others wanted me to be and others look up to.' He whispered the last part. 

 'And maybe you're right. Now I am the perfect picture and I don't even like being it.' He admitted. 

'You need to worry less and need to take time to be who you really are and not what people want you to be.' I told him. 

 'You are right. Maybe I need to take some time off.' He thought out loud. 

'Once all this is over, I will plan a vacation.' He told me and sighed loudly. He looked kind of sad. 

'Cam, are you alright?' I asked him. 'Is it only your work or is it more?' I asked him carefully. 

'It has to do with my Dad.' He explained. 

'What about him?' I asked him curious. 

'You see, he was one of the two bosses of a big Company.' Cameron told me. 'He died two years ago and every since I took his place like he asked me to before he died. I just hope he is proud of me.' He let his eyes fall down and looked at his hands. 

'Heey.' I told him. Now it was my time to make him feel okay and make him look up to me. It was my time to tell him some things he needed to hear. 

I gently turned his head to me by placing my hand under his chin. I stroke his chin softly with my thumb. 

'I bet he would be more proud than ever. You are doing an amazing job. You do everything you can to keep the company running, you work 24/7. You take care of your family and I bet that if he could see what you are doing, he would tell you the same.' I assured him. 

'Thank you.' He said and looked at me. I got lost in his eyes and we slowly got closer to eachother. My lips almost touched his and he slowly pressed his to mine.

He cut off the kiss after a few seconds and looked at me. I let go of him, he smiled and looked back at his hands. I was shocked. Did he really just kiss me? Was it because of the weird tension between us?

He stood up and wanted to walk alway but I got hold of his arm and kept him in place. 

'Please stay, I don't wanna be alone.' I told him. I felt like a four year old kid that pleaded mom or dad to stay but I was actually afraid to have another bad dream. It was nice to have Cameron around. 

'Sure.' He said and got back into the bed. 

I crawled up under the covers and Cameron scooted closer to me. He wrapped his arm around my waist while I placed my head against his chest softly. 

'Go to sleep.' He told me softly and began to hum a song. 

'Goodnight.' I whispered. 

'Goodnight.' He told me and began to hum again. 

I slowly drifted to sleep.