Loving a Monster

Zalgo Isn't the Most Horrible Thing in Existence

At some point, I started to cry and passed out, because I wake up to a knock on my door. My head hurts, but I ignore the pain as I sit up.

"Come in," I call.

I get off of my bed and pull up the drapes. When I turn around, Zalgo has seated himself on my desk chair. Waiting for him to speak, I turn to the issue of my wardrobe and unpacked bags.

"That was quite a show last night. Although, no one really understands what it was all about. Unfortunately, Ben bled enough that he won't be waking for another several hours. Mr. Blake is certainly too ashamed he was bested by a new female, as well as Mr. Woods," he explains.

I grunt. Of course those two don't want to admit what they failed to do. Raping can be embarrassing to the victim when it's actually done well, but when it's not, it's the rapist that gets embarrassed.

"The proxies claim to have no knowledge of Jefferey's intentions and no one else has come forward to claim a part in their plot."

I scoff. Of course Natalie and Jane wouldn't. I guess there's no point in them doing so. They didnt play that large of a role in the attack. Aside from the three that were actually trying to hurt me, Tim is the only one I truly hate for this. He was the one that put those accessories on me.

He's silent for a moment. "Would you care to elaborate on the story before Benjamin opens his big mouth? We both know what he'll do." He's trying to prompt me.

I sigh as I put away an extra pair of pants. "Jeff was pissed that I had embarrassed him by attacking him and almost removing his arm. So he tried to embarrass me by exploiting my femininity. Obviously, it backfired." I dont care to go into detail about it all with my biological father.

After that, he stays silent as I put away the remainder of my belongings. I put the only photograph I have of my old life on my night stand. My mother, father, brother and I had taken the picture on a vacation the same year Nick ran away.

I sit on my bed and look at Zalgo. "What do you want?" I dont say it rudely or sound harsh. I keep my voice soft and quiet. Firm, but not hostile.

He smiles gently. "The question, my child, is what do you want?"

This surprises me a bit. He isn't one that would care for someone else's wants. "What do you mean?"

He smiles. And it reminds me of the happy years of my life. Fake or not. "I mean what do you want? Clearly, you do not enjoy living here. So, what do you want?"

I scan his eyes, looking for some sign this is a trick, but all I find is affection. The affection of a father. "You're right. I hate it here. I was better with the Hunters than anywhere else, but even there, people I cared about were getting hurt," I pause, looking at the picture. "What I want. That hasn't been top priority for a very long time. Always, it was about someone else's well-being. It still is, for the most part. But I suppose... What I want is to take Jack and Nick... And go home," I look at him, and I know he knows what home I'm talking about. "I want a peaceful life with my family. I want my mother to love and care for both me and my brother, faults included. I want Jack to be human. I want to be human. And I want to live a normal, quiet life."

For a split second, his smiling face falters. He doesn't like my answer, but it's the honest one. I go back to looking at the picture while he thinks.

After several minutes of silence, he says, "I would like to show you how to control your metamorphic abilities," is all he says.

I look at him and nod. I make a mental note to thank him later.

"It takes a fair amount of energy to maintain a human form for prolonged periods of time, so don't push it at first."

He watches me, so I nod. There isn't very much I would do in a human form anyways.

"Close your eyes," I do as I'm told, "Focus on your perception of what you would look like as a human. This is most likely your previous form. Once you have a detailed image in your mind, imagine it physically in front of you."

Doing this is harder then I thought it would be. Too have an accurate image of what I look like. I used to be a lot softer, shorter. So I cant really imagine that as I am now. Still, I draw the best picture I can imagine. I try to solidify it. This is even harder.

"Imagine this image as a suit. Take it, and fold it onto your body. Imagine your eyes to go back to normal, your horns and tail to disappear. Now, will this to happen. Focus on one thing at a time and will it to change, and maintain this focus."

I remember my (s/c). I imagine my red-tinted leathery scales to fade into smooth, soft (s/c) skin. I imagine me legs getting longer, my feet getting flatter. I picture my claws to become rounded and soft. I imagins my pupils returning to my eyes, my irises shrinking to size. I picture my tail and horns receding. My fangs flattening into normal canines. I focus on all of this details, and I will them to happen. I demand it. I steal this image to my new body.

After several moments of focusing, I feel my tail going away, my feet flattening out, my horns receding into my head. The transformation isnt a bad thing, it just feels very strange. When I feel like my body is back to normal, I slowly open my eyes and look down at myself. There, where I am, in my clothes, are two very-human feet. The hands are (s/c) and rounded with normal nails. I twist and see that there is no tail attached to my back. I reach up and find no horns coming from my head.

Intense hope fills my chest as I stand and rush for the bathroom. Looking in the mirror, I see my old face. My (h/l), (h/c) framing my (f/s). My (l/c) lips, (n/s) nose, and my dearly-missed (e/c) eyes. I've missed having pupils and whites in my eyes.
((f/s)=face shape, (l/c)=lip color, (n/s)=nose shape)

Zalgo follows behind me, slow and relaxed. He watches me examine my face, feeling my no-longer pointy ears, feeling my skin and such. "Be careful with this form, child. It can be dangerous," he says quietly.

I barely glance at him. "Why?"

"Well, a number of reasons. For example, if you went to the humans looking like this, and lost your grip on it, your true form would reappear. As you can imagine, that would have immense consequences. Or, if you push it too far, you would be stranded in a form between your true one and this mask," he explains.

I try to picture it, but I notice my eyes flicker and decide it wouldn't be smart. Then, a realization hits me. I dont have a temperature higher then a hundred anymore. I reach for the faucet, focusing on myself cool. As I turn on the hot water, I think about what this could mean. If I can confirm this, I'm going to go find Jack.

Hesitantly, I poke my finger under the steaming stream of water.