Cinderella? NO

MARYAM

We took Saudi airways on Sunday and reached on the same day. We did our Umrah and finished. We went to Madinah to visit all the necessary places. I went for I visited Saudi many times but never entered into cave hirah (where prophet Muhammad(saw) received the first revelation). We went to Uhud and prayed there. We climbed Uhud and it was fun. Just like mountain climbing. We later went to visit the grave of Muhammad(saw); that's the best part. I greeted him, thanked him and asked Allah to give him his promised place. I talked with the prophet(saw) like I could see him. It felt so good and I sensed he was listening. I remembered the nights he spent standing and praying for us, I wept and thanked him again. I called mum and she said I should greet him for her. She thanked Zahra so much and prayed for her. We spent three days in Madinah and left on Thursday night to Makkah. We went to the Masjid to pray and do tawaf. During the two raka'ats after tawaf I spoke to Allah about Abdallah. I asked Allah "Allah you know better than me, you created Abdallah and know what he conceals. From what I see outside, he's a good person. But I cannot know better than you. Allah, you put feelings in our hearts so we cannot help it. I like Abdallah but I don't know if he's good for me. Allah, if he's good for me and our union is written, make things easy for us and take me closer it. I am weak and not able. You are able and wise. If our union is not written or we are not fit for each other, take us far away from each other and dispose our affairs in the best way, surely you are the best disposer of affairs." I finished my umrah and came out from King Fahad's gate and it was Abdallah I saw. He didn't see me. I went to him and said salaam. He answered and was shocked to see me. I asked if he was following me, he replied in the negative and said it's qadr. I started talking "Your answer Abdallah, I asked Allah for a way, and He made things clear to me. I don't know where this is going but why not give it a try. I accept whatever you are offering. But Abdallah, I am not Miss Perfect. I try Alhamdulillah, but sometimes I trip and fall, sometimes shaitaan gets to me. I make mistakes also, and I don't know it all. I get tempted also. So just like Allah said husband and wife are like garments to each other. That's how we are going to be(InshaAllah), help each other, teach each other and protect each other. There are so many differences between us but what gives me hope is our faith and they say 'love conquers all'" I felt really embarrassed saying the last statement, but who cares. The whole time I was talking he's smiling. I smiled and left him standing. He didn't say anything I swear.
I told Zahra about my du'a(prayer) and encounter with Abdullah. I also told her what I told him and his reaction. She smiled and hugged me. I know Zahra is hiding something from me but I don't know how to come out and ask her because I know if I really need to know, she would tell me but I also see guilt in her eyes and I know she's really holding things in. Instead I asked Allah to clear things between us and make it easy for her. Zahra told me about the death of Abdallah's aunt. She told me how close they were and how she took care of him. Obviously Imran told her. I sent Abdallah a comforting text and he asked to see me. The morning we were leaving he met me at my hotel reception and said "Thank you for everything Maryam. I wish you knew my aunt; she was my everything but Allah loves her more. Maryam there are things I didn't mention to you, things you don't know about me." I was broken but held it in "What do you mean Abdallah? Come clear" I frowned looking at him "I know you are thinking other stuff but nah, I pray, I fast. I don't have a dirty past. I was never married, never had a baby or anything you are thinking" I was relaxed a little and he continued "It's about my family." he paused and stared. I stopped him "Abdallah, this trip is my friend's trip; Zahra. I don't want you to ruin it with stuff I cannot consume. And this is Saudi, I cannot hate this place. So please, wait a little. I am leaving for Dubai today InshaAllah, when you go back we can talk. Whatever it is!" I stood up "You are very intelligent, I don't know why I approached you with this talk here. I am sorry." He said and I gave him the faintest smile I could gather and left. I talked to Zahra about it on plane and I noticed a relief from the way she looked at me. "Zahra, I know you are hiding something from me and I don't know why but I feel it is something related to what Abdallah wanted to talk about. Why won't you tell me?" I asked with a straight face. She was shocked and replied "Sabr babes. I am not in the right place to say anything. I trust Abdallah, he'll tell you and you'll do just fine." she smiled as our plane tore the clouds.