Poison Ivy || Draco Malfoy

33 - The Prince's Confession

Things turned very tense between Draco and I after our conversation down at the lake. He had seemed angry at me, somehow. And I wondered if it was because I had accused him of trying to use me like he did other women.

He had made a point of keeping a physical distance as we departed the grounds of Hogwarts, flinching when I touched his arm to Apparate him back to his apartment.

And when he turned up for classes that evening, he barely said two words to me, his face set in a kind of fierce determination as he posed for the class, and then leaving at the end without so much as a goodbye.

So, when the following morning - as I was morosely warming my hands on a cup of coffee in my studio kitchen - the door flew open to reveal a pissed off looking Draco, I was rather taken aback.

"Draco, what-?"

"You think I never fucking saw you?" he snarled, reaching inside his overcoat and retrieving an old battered looking piece of parchment. "You think I never fucking cared?"

Confusion consumed me as he angrily slammed it down on the table in front of me.

I blinked down at it, my heart hammering wildly in my chest as I tried to stifle a gasp.

It wasn't an old bit of parchment, but a tattered and torn greeting card which was held together with strips of clear tape. I felt an odd sensation in the pit of my stomach as my eyes gazed down at the hand drawn picture on the front: a white-blond haired wizard on his broomstick, chasing a Hippogriff into the skies.

I didn't have to open it to know what was written inside: Dear Draco, Don't let the Hippogriffs get you down! Yours, Ivy.

"Draco," I breathed, not quite believing my eyes as I shakily brushed my fingertips over my old artwork. "Where did you get this?"

"I accidentally knocked the common room bin over when I returned from the hospital wing." Draco explained, his demeanour calmer now as he took the seat across the table from me. "A scrap of card with my name on caught my eye, and naturally, I was curious. So I retrieved all the pieces and taped them together."

"And you kept it all this time?" I trembled, my stomach somersaulting as my eyes met his; his look solemn and piercing as he slowly nodded his head. "Draco, why did you never say anything?"

"I figured you didn't want me to have it, given the state it was in when I discovered it," he shrugged unabashedly, his eyes never leaving mine. "But I liked it; I liked it a lot. Especially as it was from you. So I kept it."

"Pansy ripped it up," I said, feeling my cheeks flame in horror and shame at the memory. "She- she accused me of trying to steal you from her."

I had to look away then, too mortified by my own pathetic admission. I waited uncomfortably for his response, all the while wishing I could somehow erase my utter embarrassment of a life.

Draco shifted in his chair, as if giving it some careful thought about what he was going to say next.

"I felt... I don't know- protective over you," he said eventually, his voice low and husky. "I thought at first it was because you were my gi- Pansy's - kid sister. But by the time I realised it was more than that, I was in a dark and dangerous place and the last thing I wanted to do was drag you into it. So I stayed away, I stayed away from everybody."

I swallowed, trying to rid the lump that had formed in my throat as I remembered how he had removed himself entirely from the world; how sick and broken he had looked, and how much I had been desperate to reach out to him, but too afraid of his rejection.

"I wished you felt you could have turned to me," I said sadly, wanting to cry so much. "I was worried about you."

"I know you were, Ivy," he said hoarsely as I felt his eyes penetrate me, "you were the only one who came to visit me in the hospital wing."

I looked up sharply, too startled to hide the shock on my face. "How did you-?"

"I wasn't always asleep," he said, his lips twitching ever so briefly up at the corners of his mouth. "I pretended - I was worried that if you saw I was awake, I'd scare you away and you'd stop visiting."

A strange, overwhelming stinging sensation appeared behind my eyes. The feeling of wanting to go back in time and do it all again was so fierce, I thought it was going to suffocate me.

"I thought about you when I was in Azkaban," he continued when I didn't say anything. I wanted to tell him to stop - not to go on and break my heart further, but I was too choked to speak. "It was the only thing that stopped me from going mad; to think that one day I could see you again. And then, when I got an invite to Pansy's wedding after I was released, I jumped at the chance," he paused, looking at me with an intense, sad longing. "But it turned out I was too late."

Tears started rolling down my cheeks - I could no longer stop them any more than I could stop breathing. My heart felt ripped and broken; full of sadness and regret.

"When I made the Unbreakable Vow," Draco went on, his voice now pained as if it was hurting him to say the words, "I thought you were happy with him. I would have never done it otherwise. I would have taken another stint in Azkaban if it meant I could finally be with you."

The words had the same effect as being punched hard in the gut over and over again. The words I had wanted to hear him say ever since I had first stepped foot on the scarlet train on the day of my twelve birthday; that he, Draco Malfoy, had wanted to be with me.

Only it was too late.

"I'm not telling you all of this to make you feel bad," Draco sighed, before slowly reaching his hand across the table to tenderly clasp my own. "I'm telling you this because I want you to know I genuinely care about you, and even though we can't ever be together, I want to at least know you are going to be safe. So please, Ivy, please see that you need to remove yourself from that man - he doesn't love you, you owe him nothing. You deserve to be with someone who respects you and treats you well."

"He- he doesn't..." I sobbed, choking on my tears, "he hasn't-"

"I saw the look on your face when I asked you about children yesterday," Draco said suddenly fierce, interrupting my attempted excuses as he clasped my hand tightly in his. "I am begging you, Ivy - choose a life that makes you happy. If the Weasley's turn their backs on you because you walk away from entering a dangerous marriage, then are they really worth it? Put yourself first, please, Ivy."

He looked at me with such pleading, begging eyes, grabbing my other hand so that he was now holding both, urging me - imploring me - to answer correctly.

A loud knocking on the studio front door made me start. My heart hammering, I swiftly pulled my hands free from Draco's as I immediately stood up to go and see who it was.

He said nothing but looked at me; disappointment and resignedness etched deeply in his face.

"And he will, by the way," Draco murmured quietly, causing me to pause at the kitchen door, "he will hurt you again. And next time, you may not even get to walk away from it."

Keeping my back to him, I lifted a trembling hand, furiously wiping my face clean of my tears as I took in his words.

And then, because I didn't know what else to do, I walked out to answer the door, leaving Draco sitting in the kitchen, staring at the card I had lovingly made for him with my thirteen year old innocent and naive heart.

*****