Wildfire

Eighty Four

With the way Rayne is wailing, I can hardly think... I know that this must be so much more terrifying for him than the rest of us but through the  horrifying sound of the calamity outside finally crashing through roof of the ballroom and his shrieking over the awful clashing of our forces against the dragons so set on getting to my sweet Moon Beam and doing what they can to take him away from me... Which will not ever be allowed to happen...

There has been too many instances of Xiang stealing peoples happiness just because he felt so inclined... But not today, and not to us... 

I should have followed my first instinct of charging after him after finding out that he himself was likely the one to try and poison my precious Queen... It would have saved us all so much time, and likely would have saved our guests from this trauma, though I cannot say for certain that Shen himself would not have been mad enough to think of such a plan as attacking us at our own wedding party on his own... After all, Xiang managed to convince him that it was somehow acceptable to attack Rayne the first time... No one in their right healthy minds decideds to attack an innocent person so viciously, even at the behest of their King. 

...

Rayne

...

If I could hide like a child under the bottoms of Emrys's robes I would find myself there in an instant with no hesitation, so fierce is the battle raging outside of Xiang's reinforced chambers... I did not think I would ever find myself fearing for my life quite so literally again... I had hoped that maybe the letter left behind by Xiang when he fled had been nothing more than a nightmare that we all wished would simply stop... There is no reason for him to hate me so much that he would destroy the palace that he's lived in for so long... The palace I was finally becoming unafraid of... 

There was no reason for him to behave so rashly... I've literally done nothing other than love his son with my entire heart... Who knew falling in love and just wanting to be the best wife you can be would end in such devastation... Or such guilt...

I cannot stop thinking about the possibility of lives being lost just because the man meant to be my father-in-law hates me so intensely that the murder of my person is the only solution he could come up with to cut me out of their lives permanently instead of simply asking me to leave... 

All it would have taken is a simple "Please go" and I would have been inclined to do as my then King had asked of me, if not only to prevent myself from feeling any further embarrassment from having the nerve to show my face here in the first place... All I have ever wanted was a fair chance to fit in with my family a bit more... Maybe to darken my hair and find a husband that loves me and wants children from my loins... I asked for exactly none of the Queendom, and yet it was gifted to me... 

And for accepting that gift and Emrys's hand I had somehow managed to have the biggest target singed into my flesh before his mark ever had a chance to decorate my skin, and I mourn for the happiness that he and Shen have stolen from us. I feel violated and angry... I am so rageful that they have left me not only in fear for my life but in fear for the lives of the ones I care most about... Our family lives here in this palace...  My father might be amongst those men... The soldiers that I have bonded with that have pledged themselves to me are out there doing every single thing they can in order to protect us while we stay shuttered away in here hoping that they do not attempt to seek us out any more than they already have...

Having been on the receiving end of so many cruel jokes I have always tried my best not to act on my anger or give myself to rage, but at the moment my beast and I would both rejoice at the chance to take our regained eyesight into battle so that we might settle this or die trying because I refuse to continue living this way... I refuse to be shuffled into the corner with Emrys wrapped around me when I know that defending me is what his beast must yearn for... 

I am tired of being afraid... I am so tired of the nightmares of the sneer given to me by Shen right before he raised his hand to strike me... I am so exhausted of feeling as though I am forced to look over my shoulder constantly, never feeling safe enough to truly leave our chambers for very long... 

...

Emrys

...

"I-I am so t-tired Emmy... P-Please m-make it stop!" Rayne begs me for something I cannot promise him at the moment... Not with the thunderous echo of fire fills the halls right outside the door... I worry for the guards stationed there and wonder if any of them have any hope at all or if Xiang's royal advantage of flame-impervious skin has left them without a true way to defend themselves or us against him... 

If there was a way to strip him of the trait I would walk out there and flay the man turned pure beast myself with dulled talons so that he'd feel every sensation my claws have to offer...

But it so turns out that I shall not have to carry myself into the other room to keep Xiang from getting anywhere near my sweet shard of starlight... For when the fighting suddenly dies back down and we are left with nothing but silence and heavy footprints... It is none other than Cho himself who opens the door for my father to peer in with his obnoxious poison-filled eyes, both of them smiling with a menace that sends chills down my spine.