somewhere only we know

saturday 10 : 07 sander

I wake up next to Britt, I try to sleep again but I cant, i remember yesterday, I think I am making progress with Robbe, he doesn't reject me at all. He always laugh at my silly jokes.

But suddenly I remember I am indeed making progress but also that I am playing a double game that i shouldn't play... something is clear for me i am not in love with Britt anymore, even if sometimes i enjoy being with her, but i am probably in love with Robbe, but it doesn't mean that i can trust him about my bipolar disorders.

Ugh I am so lost... I am gonna take a coffee, it might help.

So I put a shirt on and go in the kitchen, the shirt is long so I dont put pans, I have a boxer anyway but like who cares about wearing pants when what needs to be hidden is indeed hidden.

Only Amber is up, the other seems to still be asleep.
- Hey. I tell her
- Hey, do you know if there is fresh bread here ? she asks out of nowhere
I frown and answer :
- Hum no, I know there is bred but...
- It isnt fresh ! I know thanks for this useless information Sander ! she says back ironically
Doesn't she know that it is 10 am, that I just woke and that having someone that mean in the morning is anything but not cool ?
- Why dont eat the bred anyway ? Uh ? Come on it wont kill you, fresh or not the result is the same, it is bread.

She looks at me and comment :
- No need to be harsh !
- Harsh ? Fuck, you are the one yelling at me because there is no "fresh" bread ! I am as new as you in this house I dont even know where is the coffee !

I sight, I didnt plan to yell this morning...
She seems to understand that she crossed a limit.
- Hum the coffee is right here...

I sight again and thank her.

Suddenly Robbe enters the room.
- Hey ! he says
- Hey ! I smile while saying this
- Oh Robbe Robbe !!
He is surprised and his eyes are wild open, I think she scared him a bit Haha.
- You are Jens's bestfriend!
- Yes... and ?
- You must know where is the fresh bread !
- Oh yeah of course ! he says
- Oh really ?? she looks like she is daydreaming
- No, I think you figured this out yourself there is no fresh bread here...
- Ugh Robbe I hate you ! What can I do now ??
I frown, it is so obvious that she didnt even think about it.
- You can go buy some. I simply propose
- Yes that's right... but I dont wanna buy some, I am not motivated enough !
- Okay then dont buy some but you won't eat fresh bread today !

Robbe giggles and I cant help but staring at him. He catches me and we both look at each other until Amber asks us something :
- Guys ?
- Uh ? I answer trying to sound natural
- Could you go to the shop and buy me fresh bread ?
She makes a pity face like the kids do. Robbe doesn't look amused by the situation, he knows Amber better than I do, must be exhausting being her friend !
- No Amber, we won't buy you anything, do that yourself, you have feet ?
- Yes ? she looks confused
- You've got money ? he adds
- Yeah...
- Fine ! Then go to the shop and buy some fresh bread ! he says bothered
- But Robbe please !
He sights, I stare at him intensely, I've got an idea. He looks at me without understanding why I am staring at him like that.
- What ?
- Maybe we could go together ? I suggest
- Oh yes Sander please please please !!! yells Amber
- Amber shut it or I am changing my mind ! People are still sleeping !
- Oh yes sorry...
I look back at Robbe, he sights.
- Okay, let me put my shoes on.

He goes and then Amber says a big "yes" to herself.