somewhere only we know

friday 6:36 pm sander

Someone knocks at the door so I go open it.
A pretty tall woman is facing me.
- Hum... hello ? I say confused. Do, do I know you ?
- Not yet, I am from the social services.
- And why are you here ?
- It seems like some of your neighbors and your teachers noticed your bruises and the neighbors even heard some screams. We want to make sure that no one is being abused.
- Well no one is being abused thanks for checking on. I simply say before starting to close the door but she stops me
- Young man this is serious, and judging by the state of your face, you dont really look like you are fine. Are your parents here ?
- No.
- Okay, then let's start the inspection !
She enters
- Where is your bedroom ? she asks
- Hum in the corridor, on the right. What are you searching for ? Proofs ?
- No, all the proofs we need are on your face. Now I am searching for things that would show that your parents are barely taking care of you.
- Look I dont know who sent you but everything is okay, I am fine, I am in good shape i-
- Young man you look like you just came out from the dead.
I frown without understanding.
- What ??
- You dont look fine, you clearly have struggle to sleep, you have depression and we can see in your eyes that you are barely here.
- What do you mean...? And how do you...?
- I've seen hundreds of kids like you. I simply know that you are having an hard time.

She enters my room and look at it, it is really messy.
- Sorry I didn't have the time to-
- It is okay, dont worry, you weren't supposed to know that I was coming, it is totally understandable.
She looks at the whole place searching for details, after like five minutes she notices my medicines.
- Are those yours ?
- Yes.
- What are these for ? They look pretty... strong.
- I've got bipolar disorders.
- Oh okay, and how are your parents reacting when you make, for example, a manic episode ?

I was about to answer when we hear my parents entering the house.
- Oh and here is question time ! says ironically the woman

She introduces herself to them.
- Hi, my name is Lucy Bright, I am from the social services, it seems like someone heard screams and many people think that your son got those bruises just when they heard screams.
- That's pathetic. says my dad
- Whatever, if it happens that you made him those bruises, he wont stay here, he'll have to leave with us. We will find him a family to take care of him.
My mom suddenly answers :
- But he has a family, he's got us ! We are his family, I am his mother !
- Sure you are, but my role is to make sure that kids are safe, unfortunately yours doesn't seem safe.
- What do you mean?? Of course he is ! yells my dad
- I mean that I dont happen to be here because I felt like something was wrong, I happen to be here because people called me to check on how Sander was doing and what was going on. Now I'm asking you to please, cooperate and answer some questions.
My mom sights.
- Sure, we will.

We are all sitting around the table in the kitchen.
- So hum, Sander, how does your parents react when you do something stupid, or make them angry ?
I look at my mom and then my dad and answers embarrassed.
- Uh... nothing special...
- Can you develop? What happens exactly ?
- Well we argue, and... i hesitate
- And ?
- And that's it. I end up saying
- Are you sure ?
- Yes.
- Okay... hum, this one is for your parents, do you have any idea of what is going on in Sander's life ?
My dad laughs.
- What kind of question is that ?
- The kind of question that shows if you are paying attention to your kid or not.
- Of course we are ! interrupts her my dad
- Okay then answering the question wont be hard.
My father sights.
- He broke up with his girlfriend.
- Is that all you can tell me ? asks the woman
- What else are we supposed to know ?
- Did you know that Sander is seeing the school nurse every weeks ?
- What ?! Sander why didnt you tell us ? yells my mom worried
I dont say anything.
- It doesnt matter anyway, the fact that he is seeing another psychologist doesnt change a single thing, the only difference is that we dont pay the school nurse ! comments my dad
- You think it isnt important that your son feels so down that he has to talks to two psychologists ? suggest Miss Bright
- I know what's good or not for my son, okay ? Look at him, he is a teenager, they all go through phases, they say they are depressed but they are just being moody, that's it, okay ? Come on I dont need anyone to tell me how to educate my son and what's good for him or not !
- If you are doing so well, how do you explain my presence here ? teases him Miss Bright
- Okay I heard enough now get out.
She doesnt move.
- Are you deaf ?! Get the fuck out of my house !

She gets out without saying a word.
My dad looks at me.
- What did you tell to this school nurse ?! And why are you seeing her ?! he yells
- I didnt say anything I swear ! I didnt tell her a single thing ! i say hopeless
- Are you sure of that ?!
- Yes !
- Then why are you seeing her ? Uh ? If you dont tell her a single thing ?
- I dont have the choice ! They organized everything, I go there, sit and dont say a single thing !
- Why the hell are they forcing you to go there ?!
I stay quiet.
- Hey I asked you something !
- I might have told one of my teachers about my bipolar disorders.
He looks surprised.
- Oh... okay, that's it ?
- Yeah... I lie

My dad sights.
- Okay go to your room now.
I obey and leave.