Zoe's POV
My head angrily bubbled, my body felt like it was being constantly pummled. Then the anxiety came in.
My hands and feet froze like ice on a cold winters day, my arms despretly tried
to wrap around me for some protection.
I could hear people muttering all around me, almost like I was the human sacrifice to their god. But with my anxiety I wish I was going to die.
My mother didn't want me. My father never really liked me. Joseph is of doing 'YouTube' so he will be fine. Maybe I should just give up. I kept getting myself more and more worked up until I felt like I was about to blow.
Then I felt a long arm wrap around me, and a voice whispered
"Zoe, Zoe it will be alright, it will be okay!"
For some reason that voice slightly calmed me.
I slowly felt the anxiety float away. I looked up to see Alfie, with a concerned look on his face. He slightly smiled when he saw I had recovered from my panic attack.
Alfie steadily helped me up, his arm still tightly wrapped around my quivering body.
"Let's go sit down, and do want a cup of water?" He asked, setting me down on a nearby wooden picnic table.
I lightly nodded, my mouth to dry to talk. Although Alfie caused my panic attack, I just wanted to be near someone I knew.
After a short moment, Alfie came back with a small plastic cup of cold water.
I nodded my head in thanks, still unable to get my words out.
"Zo, I'm so, so sorry!" He said taking my hand.
"I really should go." I said.
"Zo..."
"Dont call me that!" I said.
"Why?"
"I'm sorry Alfie I need to go!" I replied grabbing my bag then walking out the park entrance.
My head was spinning and the world seemed miles away as I walked through the streets of my small village. The fields and woods that usually inspired me, seemed to be dull and grey. The sky matched that, an ugly grey with no sun to be seen. Life seemed just so. So. Horrible. Every second made me think about what I used to do. My old method of getting away from the hideous human truth.
When I reached home my head was worse than before. It was a battlefield.
I got my key out, then unlocked our green door.
I went in to see my father and mother and someone I thought I recognised.
"Oh hello Zoe," My dad called "Look who's back!"
The stranger turned around. I squeled with delight.
"Joe!" I shouted, engulfing him in a tight bear hug.
"Zoe!" He said mimicking me.
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming back?"
"It was a surprise!" He said pulling away from my hug.
"I'm just going to put my stuff down then I will be back!" I said.
"Alright!" Joe replied.
I went up to my room and turned my golden fairy lights on. They were my favourite ones. I set my bag down, then walked across the landing to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror.
My skin was pale, my makeup slightly smudged I almost looked ill. I was,honestly, a very insecure person, so I naturally built a wall around myself shutting everyone out. I hated my tiny body. I hated my children's feet. I hated my miniscule hands. I hated myself. I hated my anxiety. But most of all I hated the ugly scars that ran up my arm.
Yes, I used to self-harm. Almost everyday. It was a way of taking away the pain of having a disgraceful body that no one, not even me, wanted.
"Zoe are you coming?" Joes voice echoed up the hall.
"In a minute!" I yelled back.
I wiped my stray tears, tucked down my jumper then went down to join my family.
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A\N
Hiya Cupcakes!
How was the second chappie? Good, I hope! Is there anything you want me to add? Or any tips? Just PM me and I will reply ASAP x
Stay perfect Cupcakes! *le cakefist*
Q&A Of The Day
Have you met any YouTubers?
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