This Is Me Warts And All

Healing

28/6/2020

Fred gave me, mum, Teddy and Alex a ride to the train station. It took ages on the train to get to Skye we kept having to switch trains. Teddy went online and bought plane tickets for our journey back his treat.

There were three bedroom in the cottage so we would be okay room wise. When we got to our destination there was a bit of a panic when the lady on reception said.

"Ah the Adams it's nice to meet you both", before giving Alex the room key.

My mum was about to say we weren't the Adam's family when Teddy decided to ask her about her ideas for colours for the refit of the pub. Thankfully that changed the subject matter.

When we arrived at the cottage it' was gorgeous it was decorated in all white it was so nice. The living room looks over the road outside and a fence and just beyond it you can see the beach and sea. I'm beginning to realise how much I truly love Scotland.

After we unpack we decided to explore the town. There were several food shops so we bought food to last us for the week. Alex made us dinner it was salmon and pasta with peas and sweetcorn. We settled in for the night watching a Scottish chat show then we said goodnight and went up to bed.

29/6/2020

Alex and I spent a long time just walking today and talking. With the affair out in the open and people knowing about us and me confessing about Steve. We could really be truly honest about things Alex wanted to tell people about our marriage.

He tells me he was scared about his father knowing the truth. Then he tells me how when he was younger Elliot caught him kissing the daughter of someone he truly hates and beat him up for doing it.

Alex no longer cared about what Elliot thought because he doesn't think he will ever change. It was sad to hear and see him cry as he wonders why even though he was a doctor his father couldn't be proud of him.

Then he felt bad for talking about his dad with what I'm dealing with, with mine. I tell him that we can't allow our father's to take our current happiness away from us. They have already taken and destroy so much of our childhood.

"What about Amy she will be furious when she finds out we are married", I remind him.

"What was that you were saying about not letting people steal our happiness Cassie".

I realise he's right the road ahead with Steve will be hard especially if everything goes to trial. It's best people find out now about us and I was happy I get to wear my wedding ring. The ring my husband picked out for me and the world getting to see I'm taken.

Alex arrange for me and him to go on a fishing boat to see if we could catch some for dinner. He knows I love watching deadliest catch on the Discovery Channel.

It was an amazing experience being out to sea like that with nothing to see but water for miles. I got to help drag a net of fish in and when it was over we got a selection of fish to take home.

It was an amazing experience I made a Caribbean stew with some of the fish my mate Leroy's mum taught me to make. When I was younger I would go round his house a lot and she would teach me and Leroy to cook. So we didn't grow up not knowing how to.

I can cook loads of English food but I can cook Caribbean food as well.  As Gloria, Leroy mum would say, "You wouldn't know I wasn't Caribbean when you taste my food".

While we were eating Alex and I told mum we are married, to say she was stunned would be a understatement.

"So why the hell were you with that woman you know I heard her planning her wedding Alex. That's sick when all the while you knew she wasn't going to get her happiness".