FEELINGS | Dream & Georgenotfound

Empty

Content warning: Mature sexual content
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Everything seemed to be on track. George uploaded each video he had planned out, he stayed on schedule with his twitch streams; going back to how it was before. Ever since the trip, he felt like something was missing, he'd search his entire house, but it wasn't anything physical, it was something inside him. He was used to being alone, it was his preferred way of living. There was no expectation, no rules, no worrying. There wasn't one person watching him; he was able to keep everything to himself.

But now everything is different. Everything that he was used to has changed, and for some reason it didn't make him feel as comfortable as before. His apartment echoed with each step he took on the wooded floors. It was a modest place, not too big, but not too small to cause some claustrophobia; one bathroom, two bedrooms, nothing too complicated. His apartment laid near a quiet neighborhood, lacking in a bustling population. It was all convenient, it was a couple towns over from his birthplace, away from his childhood.

Everyday repeated itself, they exact day from the previous one. The sun rose and set, followed by the moon copying it's exact movements.

For a couple of months, George wondered why he felt so empty. He couldn't stop thinking about Clay. As weird as it felt, he couldn't stop himself, it was one of the few things that made him felt, good? The way Clay held him made him feel warm inside, he yearned to feel his warmth on more time. And now, in a week, he was going to see him again.

A sudden wave of happiness suddenly came over him. His heart skipped a beat every time he'd think of him. Clay was the first person to ever show him so much affection and care, George even had to Google what the words "affection" and "care" meant, and Clay seemed to fit those definitions to an extent. Everyone around him seemed to have friends, knowing how to manage those relationships. But now the idea of friendships was constantly changing.

He knew that friends are supposed to share things in common, hang out and support each other. But, are they supposed to hold each other and sleep together? Maybe it wasn't too uncommon, maybe it was Clay's way of being his friend. Well, he feels comfortable around Clay and he helped him sleep at night - there wasn't anything wrong with that.

George laid on the couch, going through the channels on his tv. He tried to fill his day with something to watch; maybe that'd help with his constant boredom. He quickly flipped through the channels, not giving it much thought. His finger pressed the button until he suddenly stopped.

He stared at the TV wide-eyed. Moaning sounded through the speakers. A couple on the screen were groping each other, kissing each other all over. The man grabbed the woman's breast, nearing his mouth towards it. George's face turned red, quickly shutting off the tv.

He looked at the black screen.

It was something that he was lacking. Strangely enough, he didn't crave for sexual satisfaction, it was something that didn't seem necessary. Although, was it bad to think about? Well, he didn't want to think about his time with Alex, it was off putting.

He unknowingly thought back to the time they went swimming in the ocean. The image of Clay's wet biceps, tender pec's and thighs was glued inside of his brain. Even better, the sensation of his soft skin in his hands sent chills throughout his body. He wished he could feel his arms right about now. George felt himself grow hard.

Wait, this is wrong.

His entire face became flushed, heating up from the inside.