Gino
Living a life without sense is like water being poured in a container I just take the shape of it, not resisting not even dreaming anymore.
I do not know what to pray anymore. I even don't know why am I still living. So as long as I can, as long as I am, I'll just continue breathing. If one day, I need to leave this world permanently, I just wish to hold her hand once again.
Haii. Ayoko sanang lumabas, masaya na akong andoon sa apartment pero kailangan kong kumain and I do not have supplies anymore. So I went to a supermarket.
I was about to take a cart when a kid bumps me.
"Sowweee Mister!"
"Hi!" bati ko sa bata, sa dami naman ng makakasalamuha ko, anak pa ni Annika
"Hello, Mister! You are Mama's patient!"
"Yes, what are you doing here?"
"I'm waiting for Mama."
"Where's your Mama?"
"Lexi!! I told you not to run! You know naman that Mama can't run."
Fitted dress, high heels, paano nga naman sya makakatakbo.
"Soweeee Mama." the kid hugged Annika
"Don't run again away from Mama okay?!"
The kid nodded. Annika carried her daughter and put her on the cart. Tsaka sya lumingon.
"Gino! Ikaw pala yan. Hindi kita napansin. Sorry."
Napangiti ako.
"Maggogrocery ka din?"
I nodded.
Annika smiled. "Kami din kasi itong makulit na to baka mangayayat, lagot kami kay Daddy." Annika tickled Lexi making Lexi laugh.
It sounded so good that it pinched my heart. Daddy, haii, how I would like someone to call me that. Ay hindi pala. Ayoko ng Daddy, gusto ko Tatay. Kung hindi lang talaga siguro ako gago, someone might be calling me Tatay already. Kung sana'y hindi ako umalis ng araw na iyon. Kung sana'y nagtiis pa ako. Kung sana'y di na lang din ako nagalit. Napakasarap naman talagang mangarap.
Suddenly my heartbeats got heavier and I had chest pains. I paused. Will this be my last day?
"Gino?" Annika came closer to check my pulse.
"Napagod siguro ako kanina. Hehe."
"I told you to rest."
"Nagpapahinga naman ako kaya lang andami kong fans, tinakbuhan ko kanina."
"Gino, that's bad."
"Ikaw naman, okay lang ako, nasa labas ka ng clinic mo, dapat hindi ka nagpapacoconsult."
"Nasa labas man o loob ako ng clinic, doctor ako."
"Mama! Mama!! Hungry."
Annika laughed heartily.
"Oo na, lagi ka na kang hungry ah! Kakain tayo after mag grocery. Baka mangayayat ang baby ko na 'to."
Annika is chubby when she was younger, just like her kid. Maagang bibigay ang puso ko neto pagnagkataon. Seeing the both of them being this sweet to each other makes my heart go in pain. Seeing the love of my life loving a kid she had with someone else, seems like suicide.
"Gusto mo bang sumabay na sa aming mag grocery at kumain?"
Ang hindi ko alam ay bakit ako pumayag. Dumagdag ang bigat at sakit ng puso ko dahil sa lubos na panghihinayang. Para akong live na nanonood ng panaginip ko. The kid got the same taste with her Mama, from the biscuits, juice pati na din fruits. Nakasunod lang ako sa kanila.
