Hope And Faith ✓

10. Faith

Author: What was the happiest moment of your life?

Hope: When my mother taught me how to skate. She told me as long as I kept my balance I could do anything.

~Hope Manchester.

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"Want some?" Chase offered me his popcorn but I shook my head.

"Thanks but don't worry," he nodded in understanding and went back to eating his popcorn as he stared at the large TV screen.

The past two days had probably been the most stressful. In between dealing with my brothers, frequent phone calls from my nosy parents, therapy and having a friend now things were annoyingly different.

I had never been the one to like different, different meant change and that meant going out of my comfort zone. I didn't like that at all, going to Sam's sessions were still new to me. I wasn't used to getting dressed for therapy and driving down there with one of my brothers.

Change is scary.

I guess I just wanted to stay in my little bubble and never get popped out of it, it wouldn't be so bad, honestly. It would save me from a lot of things, and like right now - a lot of thinking.

When Hope had grabbed my arm I wanted to yank it away, hit her with something, run away. But I didn't. I was uncomfortable and I could feel a panic attack on the way but I did my best to act like I was alright and I didn't care, but I did.

I guess you could say even my brothers touching me was something I wasn't at all comfortable with, it's not everyone you can trust. The people you think should be the ones you trust the most may end up being the ones who are responsible for breaking you.

In my case, you could say he never even had my trust but he still left me shattered.

Just like they did to Hope, but unlike me, she's still in the game, she's playing Miss. Oblivious. It was a dangerous game she was playing.

I had heard things from my brothers to have a decent view of her friends. Rich, snobby, envious, fake. It was where I had classed them into. I would not tell Hope this though.

The most bitter lessons should be learnt through realisation.

I couldn't always be there pointing out her mistakes, she was human, she had the right to make them. Her friendships were scary, being friends with a bunch of fake people was not healthy.

It was dangerous, in movies and cliché books they talked about the fake queen bee who's trying to steal the nerd's boyfriend with her wannabes.

They made it seem like her backup or sidekicks were all as fake as her and it was healthy to have that type of friendship when it was not.

Those ‘wannabees’ stories after the couples were never told. It was like everyone else but the queen had a happy ending. Even though everyone deserves one because everyone has a past.  But they made it seem fine, it wasn't. Most of her sidekicks were either too used to the life of fakeness or couldn't live without it.

Hope, from what I observed, was the first kind.

From our conversations about her friends I always wanted to ask her why she never left their circle and moved on with her life like she was expected to - what she was capable of doing. But she had become so used to it that she couldn't see herself in anything that wasn't fake.