23. Faith

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Author: What's something that some people find out when it's too late?

Hope: That you're not and will never be alone. Even when you think you are, look around you. You may find that boy that has been crushing on you for years and just wants you to notice him. Or that girl with glasses that always gets bullied but looks at you in admiration because you've never bullied her. Or you little sister that always finds a way to be a pain in your ass but behind your back, she's bragging to her friends of what a great sister she has.

In life, you can never be alone. It took me quite some time to figure that out.

~Hope Manchester.

••

My lips pursed as I stared at my suitcase. I had tried to remind myself over and over again that I was not going to New York for a fashion parade, but that was not the way my mind worked.

I sighed, the weather there would be cold, it would be better if I wore a jacket or something.

I shut my eyes and threw the short yellow day dress into my suitcase against my better judgement.

If your outfit doesn't have sunglasses it's a fashion disaster.

I smiled when I remembered Melody's words. But my smile soon dropped when I turned around to see the letter in a white envelope.

I did not want to do this. Going back home, seeing Melody's mother again, looking at her sick bastard of a father in the eyes.

It was all too much and overwhelming. The thought alone made my chest ache. And once again I needed a distraction, if I didn't get one soon I would be left alone with my mind and that was never good.

Playing around with my phone didn't work, I couldn't log into my social media accounts out of fear that I would get trolled and games didn't catch my interest anymore, my chest kept on aching me and it was just them I realise that it had been days since I last took my antidepressants-not that I needed them anyway. Sam had talked me into taking them but by the time I had gotten back home with Chase and Hugo, I was exhausted and just wanted rest.

I bit my lower lip when someone knocked on the door. Without waiting for my response I watched as the door slowly opened revealing Chase with a smile on his face.

"I could have been naked," I deadpanned as he walked into my room and took a seat beside me on my bed, sitting on my blanket.

"But you weren't," he pointed out and took a bite of the red apple I just noticed he was eating. "Want a bite?" I scrunched my nose and shook my head as he offered me his apples.

Fruits are disgusting.

Besides, red apples always reminded me of stupidity in the form of Snow White. Who takes apples from strangers anyway?

"I can't believe you're leaving soon," Chase finally said after realising that I was not going to try and make a conversation with him. "It was like just yesterday you came." I nodded my head even though I didn't want to think about it. Thinking about it only made the chest pain I was trying to ignore hurt more.

"I mean I am going to miss you guys a lot. Especially since Mom doesn't want me schooling around here. She already has her sights on Europe after all this is over with." I replied. Since I had not put any thought into college my Mom had. Before I was sent here she made me take several online classes and final exams into different schools in Europe, knowing that I would not complain she had even had me take a few to Asia. She put more thought into my future than I did.

I heard Chase sigh. I didn't have the guts to look at him. I was scared that if I did look at him I'd cry. It had taken everything in me not to cry in the first place. "She's just being cautious. She knows that there's a chance that if you win people wouldn't still believe you and would troll you, she just wants to ensure your safety," I ignored the truth of his words.

"Probably, but there's also a chance that she just doesn't want anyone to know that I'm her daughter. I mean look at it from this way, on a normal day Dad was already embarrassed by me, now he's no longer coming in public because he probably thinks I'm a disgrace, no longer a mere embarrassment. And Mom? She just wants her name cleared as soon as possible so she can launch her new make-up line." I replied him still avoiding his gaze, aware that his eyes were fixed on me.

"Mom and Dad aren't perfect. Everyone fucks up once in a while and they did theirs big time, they believed the press over their own daughter but now that they're trying to make amends just forgive them, Faith. Dad may be acting as a huge ass now but truly he's made a lot of sacrifices for you." I gritted my teeth and finally turned to look at Chase.

"What sacrifices has he made? None. Aside from his business no longer blooming as much as it used to I'm not sure there's anything he's lost. At this point, he's living the dream life." Chase just shrugged.

"He may not have fulfilled his role as a father to you but look at it this way, if Mom and Dad weren't half as powerful as they are where would you be? Melody's dad would have told the police that you were the one who pushed her down the stairs. You would be in jail, Faith. That's the sick truth. If you don't have power in this twisted world only the people that do can get away with things like this. You should be thankful for Dad, if he didn't care he would have let you be."

I let his words sink in. I had not thought about it. There was a part of me that knew that whatever he did or said couldn't change how terrible he was to me-his blood and only daughter. He treated me like I was a one-dollar hooker. Like I was a leech who fed on his attention and money. I never felt like I had a Dad. It was more like he was a sperm donor.

And Mom, she just went along with anything her husband did. She was a submissive wife that believe anything her husband told her, would feed on his every word. She too was trying to make amends. But I didn't care.

They had only started to make amends when life had started treating me and them- worse than it had before. I hated that they made me feel like I was of no worth. I felt like I was a nobody around them.

When I was with Mel I felt wanted, like there was someone in this world other than my brothers- that acknowledged my existence. After her death, I had never felt more empty. But then moving away from Mom and Dad had made me realise something.

That in life, even when you think that no one in the world cares anymore, you can never be alone. Ever.

When I remembered Hope I remembered that. She made me realise that I couldn't ever be alone, that if I ever was she was one message, one call or even one block away.

My heart clenched when I remembered that I couldn't return the favour to her. If I did another scandal would come out, I did not want that. But I could do my best and give her something that would make her realise that even if I was not there I would always be beside her.

My mind turned to the letter. "Hey, Chase," when he heard his name he looked at me. From the look in his eyes, he was deep in thought. "Can you do me one last favour before I leave?"

He looked at me and slowly smiled. It was a sad one, I noticed. "On a scale of 1 to 10 how badly am I going to be breaking mother's rules?" He asked me, he sounded amused but I knew he was far from it.

I managed to force a smile for his sake. "If you count having communication with the outside world, leaving the house, deceiving the rest of our dearest brothers, ignoring Mom for a while and faking an identity: I'd say it's about a solid 10."

Chase used his hands to lean back on my bed. He looked like he was thinking about something, I wanted to know what it was but I had no right to pry. At least not until I could assure that this would go well.

"I'm listening," he said a few minutes later and I sighed in relief then asked him:

"How good are you in disguises?"

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