39: Start Over

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"What?" Jimin asked slowly. "Who?"

It seemed that he had once again forgotten how to use his brain and think about what he was doing, because apparently he had mentioned Yoongi. That, or Jeongguk had somehow found out, though he didn't know how he would've.

Unless he'd been stalking him or something, which would've scared him more than if Jeongguk had just seen them.

"I'm just asking who Yoongi is," Jeongguk said, tilting his head as if Jimin were some kind of otherworldly creature.

Jimin was still internally panicking even when Jeongguk had tried to reassure him, but only because somehow part of his brain was convinced that he was just trying to ignore the fact that he said it out loud. But he still had the pulling feeling that he had said more than he meant to.

If he had, Jeongguk certainly didn't react the way he had thought he would.

"Yoongi?" He asked while Jeongguk nodded to further emphasize the fact that Jimin was overthinking this too much. "Oh, well he's someone."

Jeongguk stared at him with his eyes partially closed, that look he did when the answer confused him.

"Someone I met when you were gone," Jimin continued. "He was so nice when we were talking, and we met up and did stuff together. Of course he could never replace you, I just needed to see someone other than myself and the other students. Otherwise I would go crazy."

There was no way that he was going to tell Jeongguk the whole story. Meeting someone was one thing, but dreaming about them before he met them was a whole nother thing. He'd only tell that story when he absolutely had to.

Talking about it out loud to someone who wasn't involved with it made him intensely uncomfortable for some reason, which was why he didn't tell Jeongguk in the first place.

He sighed when Jeongguk didn't answer for a while, leaving them in an awkward silence once again. It was drawn out for a while longer than the last time, but at least they didn't have to mention things they didn't want to. That, and they could think about things to say or other things that they wanted to mention.

"Oh," Jeongguk said. "I was just wondering since you said it, y'know, when you zoned out for a bit."

Jimin wished he would've told him that before when he wasn't freaking out and so that he didn't have to go through what he had. Though he couldn't complain, he was glad he hadn't said more than that. If he had, he might've been screwed.

They both sat still for a few more minutes, the uncomfortable and tense silence tightening around Jimin's throat until he felt like he would suffocate if he didn't say anything. Again, Jeongguk beat him to the empty space, filling it with words that came in a soft voice, probably not intended for him to actually hear.

"I have something important to tell you."

Jimin raised his eyebrows at the boy in a questioning manner, not able to move his mouth for the time being.

"I really understand if this upsets you," Jeongguk continued. "And I also understand that this may make you angry. Feel free to tell me anything or stop me, I know it might be a lot of information, but it would be wrong of me not to tell you."

"What is it?"

"Well," Jeongguk paused, playing with the material of his clothing in between his fingers. "I uhm—"

"Just tell me," Jimin said. "It's okay."

"Yeah, well see, that's what I'm worried about," Jeongguk whispered. "What if it's not?"

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