Summer Nightfalls (Completed) [R18]

13 : Capillary Blood Glucose

Ivana

I did not give up. I held on to what I've promised Jed. Gabi na at nakauwi na rin ang morning shift kanina pa. 3-11 shift na ang ongoing ngayon.

Ang buong akala ko ay umuwi si Doc Luigi pero alam kong nasa tabi tabi lang siya. This is the advantage of having a neurosurgeon as chief of surgery, madalas nasa neuroward. Kawawa tuloy iyung ibang wards dahil hindi masyadong nabibisita.

Hanggang ngayon ay masakit parin ang loob ko kay Doc Luigi. Jed is already awake, nabawasan na rin iyung mga seizure episodes niya. Tahimik lamang ako habang nakaupo sa may kahoy na bench sa mini garden nang maramdaman kong may umupo sa tabi ko.

" You need to go home and rest" Boses niya iyon.

" I can't. May pasyente akong binabantayan" I told him.

" You really care so much for him. And I hate it" He said.

" How are you Ivana?" Seriousness was evident in his voice. Ang tahimik ng paligid, nakakabingi tuloy ang katahimikan.

" I am still an intern. Marami pa akong dapat matutunan sa pagmemedisina. Mahirap pero kaya ko. It's just that, some situations makes me need the help of someone." I told him honestly.

" I'm proud of you" This time, I looked at him.

" Why don't you want to operate on him? Kung dahil 'to sa nakaraan natin, sana ay huwag nating idamay si Jed. Critical ang kondisyon niya. Hindi simple lang ang sakit niya, Luigi." I told him. Huminga siya ng malalim.

" You don't have the right to act this way Luigi. Dahil ikaw ang tumapos sa kung anong meron tayo noon. I've respected your feelings before, sana hayaan mo din naman akong sumaya" May hinanakit kong wika sa kaniya.

" Will you forgive me if I say that I have regretted what I did? I left but my heart stayed with you. Because I cannot accept the fact that I have hurt you. And seeing you now, in love with someone else, pains me. Madamot ako, Vana. Hindi ko matanggap na may iba ng nagmamay-ari ng puso mo na dapat ay ako lang" Lahat ng mga sinasabi niya ay ibinaon ko na sa limot.

" You have your own happiness, Luigi. Nagpaubaya ako kahit masakit. At alam nating pareho iyon" I told him

" After I left, I have not opened my heart to anyone. I have realized how much you mean to me and losing you made me miserable. I've spent my days studying. But everyday without you by my side made me realize more how much I miss you so bad" Bakit niya sinasabi ang lahat ng 'to sa akin.

" You left with Dra. Mhysty. Don't fool me." I whispered.

" I never left with Mhysty. I've never had any communication with her since that day. I have lived carrying just my memories with you" Wika niya. I breathed in deeply.

" We cannot undo the past anymore Luigi. Gusto ko sanang malaman mo na iba na ang sitwasyon ngayon. I have moved on. I have learned to love Jed. He is my life now. Hindi ko alam kung kakayanin ko pa kung mawawala siya sa akin." I wiped my tears.

" I guess this is my agony, Ivana. I'm jealous. Kung hindi lang ako naging gago noon, akin ka parin sana." He said.

" I'm begging you Luigi. Parang awa mo na, please take his case." I begged once more. Hanggang kailan ba ako dapat magmakaawa sa kaniya.

" Hindi ko kaya, Ivana. Accepting his case means accepting defeat. Ayokong buhayin ang taong magiging dahilan ng pagkawala mo sa akin. Ang taong karibal ko sa 'yo." Maslalo akong napapikit sa sinabi niya.

" We are in a cruel world, Luigi. But how I wish there's no place for selfishness. We are not meant for each other. We were never destined. Dahil 'tong puso ko, iba na ang sinisigaw. Iba na ang hinahanap. At hindi na iyon ikaw" I told him the truth. Napayuko ito sa sinabi ko.