Crown of a Prince (Finn Shelby)

28.

Ailbhe woke the next morning with a pounding headache and tears that had dried onto her face. She felt embarrassed and stupid for what had happened the night before. She was furious with herself more than any other emotion. She couldn't understand why she just couldn't tell Finn how she felt. He meant everything to her, he had since they were kids but there was a part of her that didn't want to rock the boat, to change the dynamic and make it real. She had so much scrambling around in her head, fear and grief, confusion and a loss for words because of everything her family was going through. She was also furious with Finn. He had just stormed out and left her there.

After a few hours of lying-in bed and feeling sorry for herself she pulled herself up. She couldn't mope around forever and the only person she wanted to talk to, the only person who she could always trust and rely on to cheer her up was the one person she knew didn't want to see her. She took a shower and got dressed, tying up her hair and hanging up the dress she had worn last night. Even if it had spent the night crumbled up on the floor, it didn't deserve to stay rolled up in a ball. As she hung it up, she ran her fingers down the material remembering how it had felt against her skin and how Finn had bunched it in his hands, how he had unzipped it carefully and let it drop to the floor. And then how he had walked away from her, leaving her to feel more alone than ever.
She felt claustrophobic and trapped in the small room, in the room that she now couldn't help but think about Finn in. Memories of him inhabited every corner. She pulled on a coat, leaving the house and walking to try clear her head. She made it to the canal where she started walking along but thoughts of Finn never left her. She couldn't get him out of her head and just when she thought she was going to start crying again she heard a voice calling her name.

She turned on her heel, her handbag clutched in her hand in case she would need her gun but it was no one threatening. It was just Bonnie.

"Ailbhe hey, I saw you walking and thought I'd come say hello" He smiled, he clearly didn't have a hangover and looked a lot better than Ailbhe.

She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes and he could tell she wasn't her usual self.

"Are you alright?" he asked, stepping closer and reaching out his hand to touch her arm but she stepped back from him.

She nodded, pulling on a smile that was a lot more convincing but still didn't make him buy it.

"Should you really be walking out here alone?" he asked, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking over his shoulders.

He was under instructions that no member of the Kennedy or Shelby women should be left unprotected at any time. He had to obey orders and if that meant walking along the canal with her then so be it.

"No, I shouldn't" Ailbhe admitted, covering her face with her hands for a second and sighing.

"Why don't you sit down for a moment?" Bonnie offered, knowing something was deeply troubling her. He had never seen her like this, he didn't think she felt things this deeply. She seemed to be so tough, that she had so much of a barrier you couldn't get past it.

She reluctantly took his offer, sitting down on a crate that was stacked along with plenty others outside Charlie's Yard.

"I told you it's better to not know your age, look at you. You're eighteen and freaking out about how old you are already"

He joked, trying to lighten the mood and stop the tears that he knew she was holding in. He knew she was too proud to cry in front of him and if she did, she would be mortified.

She laughed weakly, looking over at him. He really was a kind person for someone who made his money through fighting.

"Shut up" she laughed, nudging her elbow against him.

"Seriously, Ailbhe" his tone softened "Are you alright?"

She sighed, that was a good question.

"I like you Bonnie, I like you a lot. I think you're kind and sweet and I trust you" She blurted out before she knew what she was going to say.

She watched his face as he processed it, nodding at her.

"But" She started to say, to finish her sentence but he interrupted her.

He leaned forward and brushed a lock of hair away from her face and before she could react his lips were on hers. They were soft and gentle and his hand was delicate against her face but she felt no spark, nothing like the flames and heat she felt with Finn. She pulled back immediately, leaning away from him to put some distance between them.

"I'm sorry" Bonnie blurted out, knowing he might have pushed his luck by kissing her.

She looked shocked and she put her hand over her mouth as if she couldn't believe he had just done that.

"You shouldn't have done that" she whispered, her eyes frantically looking around for fear someone had seen them.

"I'm sorry Ailbhe" he exclaimed as she stood up, starting to pace in front of him and wringing her hands uncomfortable.

"Bonnie why would you do that?" She whined, holding her hand up to her forehead and pressing, hoping it would relieve her headache but it was pounding even worse now.

"Because I like you" he replied instantly, barely having to think about it "I saw you and I thought you were the prettiest thing I'd ever seen. And then I got to know you and you were more than just a pretty face. I like you"

Ailbhe turned on her heel to look at him. He leaned against the crates, so casual and saying all these things as if it was the easiest thing in the world to open up to people, to say what you felt.

"Ailbhe" He called her, making her look at him "I like you. And I'd never forgive myself if I didn't take my chance and try to win you over."

She looked back at him. Things would be so easy with him, so simple if only she could like him back. But she didn't, not in the way she felt about Finn.

"I'm sorry Bonnie but I can't, I have... well me and Finn we're..." She tried to explain, to offer a valid explanation for why she could never give him what he wanted but words failed her.

"I know" Bonnie nodded, looking down at the ground "I'd have to be blind not to see that Finn Shelby is in love with you."

Ailbhe froze. If Bonnie could see it after knowing them for less than a few days, it must be public knowledge. People really would have to be pig ignorant not to see it. The way they watched each other, the way it seemed like Ailbhe had a magnetic pull over Finn that when she moves, he is pulled with her, the way Finn would sooner die than let anything happen to her.

But Bonnie wasn't finished.

"But I also know you aren't together, so I thought I had a chance to win you over" he laughed innocently, removing his hat and running his hand through his hair. He hadn't been forced to get a peaky boy's haircut yet.

"I'm sorry Bonnie" she sighed, not knowing what else to say. She barely understood what was going on in her head so she couldn't even explain it out loud. She just knew it wasn't fair to keep Bonnie on strings, waiting for her to get over someone she doubted she could ever forget.

"It's alright Alv" he nodded, standing up and slapping his thighs "Friends?" He asked, his eyebrows raised.

"Friends" she nodded, a small smile on her lips.

"For now, at least" He called over his shoulder, half-jokingly as he walked back towards Charlie's Yard.