Crown of a Prince (Finn Shelby)

*II*

Summer, 1929

Ailbhe had been gone for twenty-five days and fifteen hours.

Finn had been lonely for twenty-five days and fifteen hours.

He'd always been good with stats but these were easy to remember.

Finn had tried to write a letter to Ailbhe seven times.

He had stopped himself seven times, always after realising he couldn't spell half of the words he wanted to say and couldn't articulate the other half in a way that made sense.

He had gotten drunk thirteen times.

And he had hated himself for being so weak thirteen times when he spent the morning shivering in bed or crouched in the bathroom when he would wake up inevitably alone.

He had been kicked out of Tommy's office six times in the last two weeks.

Tommy had zero answers for him and had no time for Finn's desperate demands.

Tommy hated it as much as Finn did. He knew this. But he had to send Ailbhe to America. Alone. Finn hated it but Tommy could live with people hating him so long as Ailbhe was free and alive. That's all he ever wanted for her.

Finn had demanded to know what they were doing and what they were going to do to get her home. Finn was starting to think Tommy was sending him on fool's errands to keep him busy and keep his mind off her. Nothing worked though.

Tommy was losing patience for his brother who seemed to be falling apart without her. It wouldn't be good enough. He would have to be a man.

But she invaded every part of him, his life and his senses. Constantly reminding him of his loss and that he wasn't whole anymore.

It was infuriating, exhausting and it was utterly maddening to feel so weak and feeble. But above all, it was fucking heart-breaking. But Finn had to swallow it all down and accept that this was his life right now.

It was his life because she had been her stupid, brave, reckless, horrifically selfless and kind self and helped that stupid, reckless bitch, Maggie Brennan. Ailbhe had saved her. And ruined their lives with one morally grey decision after another and he hated her for it. He hated her so much because he loved her so fucking much he wanted to find Maggie Brennan and hand her to the police in place of his Ailbhe. He wanted to do anything but sit and wait for Tommy to find an opportune moment to save her.

Patience was never a virtue of Finn's.

Ailbhe had told him many times he was impatient. He also knew that he was impulsive, bad tempered, possessive and easily irritated. But she loved him anyway. She always had.

She said he was kind, strong, brave for others and undoubtedly fierce in the way he loved her and his family.

Whatever he was, he was hers. He knew this.

But sitting at home, sulking and mourning the loss of his better half wasn't good enough for Isaiah and his friends anymore. That was how he was dragged to The Garrison, told to slap a smile on and stop being such a 'miserable bastard' because it was Bonnie's birthday and he was going to at least pretend to enjoy it.

Finn knew that it wasn't actually Bonnie's birthday. Ailbhe had told him once that Bonnie didn't know his date of birth, so they had chosen a day at random for his boxing registration forms. That was today apparently.

"Bottle of whiskey, Irish" Finn nodded at the barkeep, putting his cash on the counter.

The man waved a hand, mentioning it was on the house. Everything usually was. But Finn left the cash there anyway.