The Sacrifice: Fallen | Loki | Book 2

Chapter 25: Heartbeat

When the dream touches ground, the demons walk in. And I know what awaits.

- In Vain (by Within Temptation)

A scream had died down, while another had torn through it. Loki's knees hit the ground, where he broke down in an instant. His hands shot to his head, gripped his hair, trying to hold himself together. The sobs escaped him before he could sense them coming. Salty tears gathered at his chin, fell. He wasn't a man, nor a fighter, he was the anxious young prince he'd been years ago. 

His body ached, the sudden release of so much energy had left him sore to the core. Shame burnt in his chest, guilt, regret, loss. His heart bled, it had before - only this time, Loki thought it might bleed for real. He had killed his own mother, the only creature to ever truly love him. He had staked too much, too high. Had miscalculated. He had started a massacre, up there, down here. 

Loki saw himself through the tears, his contorted reflection in the broken glass, crying back at him. Green eyes stared back - couldn't recognize the demon in there. Nothing of the heart remained. The sun broke through the clouds, but refused to shine light onto him. The bronze silhouette towering over him bathed him in shadow. Gravity felt a thousand times stronger, pressing him to the ground, seemingly engulfing him - that's what he wished. To disappear, without trace and memory, wiped out of minds and existence. 

Just a heartbeat away, another scream sounded. His limbs were stiff and numb, and without knowing how he did it, Loki pushed himself off the ground at once. Unsteady on his feet, he had almost reached for hold to the bronze statue - before exhaling forcefully and hitting his temple repeatedly with the palm of his hand. Stay with me.

Loki pressed his ear to the bronze man's chest. Nothing of the heart remained. Cold and silent. 

He snapped out if it, rushing up the source of the anguished screaming holding his spine upright. With every step, he felt himself sink deeper. The gates of hell had opened just underneath the ground, calling, singing to him, dragging him down. He had to resist just for a little while longer. 

The force of the blast waves had wrecked his library. Without a care in the world, Loki pushed the shelves and ornaments out of his way until he reached the door where all the golden stripes met. This chamber.

Caroline lied on the bed, panting, screaming, crying. The hologram had reappeared over her, several parameters flashed red. Her abdomen - it had swollen bigger. Another faint groan sounded from the opposite corner - it was Xenia, whom Loki had completely forgotten about. Had she been there when it all happened - she'd be dead without doubt. Loki was in no state to deal anymore damage to anyone. 

He hurried to Caroline's side. Time had left its marks on her - another addition to the endless list of faults by the God of Mischief and Lies. The realization hit him mercilessly - he had moved forward in time, and they had been too close. 

"I- I don't know what's happening - "

Xenia slowly awoke from unconsciousness. Her head spun, but she managed to stand. Loki had taken Caroline's face into his hands, attempting to talk soothingly to her. His eyes gave him away - there was something too intense, too troubled about them. The mask was flawed. 

"I will never let anything happen to you. I swear to you, on my life." Loki told once more. He doubted that he could protect anyone anymore - it was him, always him. There was nothing else he could've told her. 

He turned to the drawer, where he had stored some sterile tools and anesthetics. The IV had come off, Loki threw it away and started installing a new one, before moving to the other arm and doing the same. She couldn't keep receiving saline solutions for volume, she needed blood - and there was only one unit. Loki cursed unrestrainedly. Could he bring Tom back, to get to more of his blood? He didn't know.