No Longer a Monster | Chenji

Chapter 30:

"Of course, I do... I'll always love you, Jisung, no matter what happens... What's- What's going on with you? I'm really worried... I'm really worried about you."
"... I just want you to know that I need you... I need you to live..."

What Jisung said made Chenle feel even more confused, knowing that it wasn't usual for the prince to have multiple mental breakdowns every now and then. Jisung's words can even be interpreted as his last words before something else happens. Chenle knew that something was definitely going on with Jisung but his boyfriend wouldn't even tell him what's truly happening to him.

Jisung didn't want him to be involved as he knew that this situation would cause both panic and distrust.

"... Whatever's going on with you... I just know that we can fix it together, alright? We will fix this."
"... I hope so... but I just want you to stay with me for now- Please just... just stay for me."
"... I will."

Chenle responds as he lays down beside Jisung, his arm around him as he tries to comfort him. It's been a few days where Chenle always stays with Jisung for the past few nights because of his abrupt panic attacks or his self-doubts.

Especially, his odd nightmares that come and go multiple times in a week.

~

A few quiet moments later, Chenle awakens to the sound of fear. Of course, that was Jisung crying and cursing at something probably scary to "go away". Chenle rubs his eyes before lightly shifting the prince's body back and forth to wake him up from a certain nightmare.

"Please don't kill them. Don't kill him. Please- Please don't hurt him-"
"Jisung- Jisung..."

Chenle wakes him up as Jisung finally opens his eyes, his hands clutching Chenle's shirt as he starts crying to him once again. Obviously, the sky was still dark since Chenle couldn't even raise his voice to wake Jisung from his nightmare. If Jisung could've been more transparent towards his relationship with Chenle, then this couldn't have been taken lightly.

"I'm so sorry, Chenle. I just... I just feel so horrible..."
"... What are you so sorry for, my Jisung? You've done nothing wrong at all. Please don't hate yourself because of it..."

Chenle says, brushing Jisung's hair with his fingers to comfort him. Chenle pulls Jisung closer to him, wanting to keep him safe and to calm him down from all of the fright he's been feeling. Unfortunately, those nightmares weren't just normal nightmares. Those were Jisung's communications with the demon, Amélie.

Of course, Amélie's taunts were the same as any other demon's taunts such as killing their loved ones, their significant other, or wiping out the whole world in a single blink. But Amélie was more strategic, slowly taking over the younger one's mind before she mentally and physically wipes away everything that Jisung is and will turn him into a monster just like her. Of course, Jisung doesn't want to be the villain all over again, knowing that it cost him a lot of his victims' deaths.

Jisung couldn't forget all of that even if he wanted to. Why? Because once he forgets all of his memories he has a tendency to love himself for so long. He barely even knows who he really is right now, what more if all of his memories were taken away from him?

~

On the other side of the kingdom is where Sicheng lives. Of course, he points and does other artistic activities like pottery or writing poems whenever he feels like it. He's an extraordinary man with such humility as his house isn't even that luxurious or huge! He even lives with his parents!

But underneath all of that humility was guilt. He knew that he could've told the royal council about it. He never told anyone that he had been once stabbed by the reformed prince in the past. Why? Because he didn't want his family to die.