Whispers of the Darkness

Chapter 18: A thousand cuts

TW: self harm

Kai carried her back home, he even took off her makeup for her, things you learn during a relationship, he sighed. He changed her into a giant T shirt, and tuck her in bed, he left a tablet of pain killer with a glass of water on her nightstand, he was about to leave but she grabbed him and pulls him back.

"Don't go mom," Evalynn mumbles, he chuckles, "I'm not your mom sweetheart, I'm Kai," he put her hand back in the blanket. She opens her eyes and seeing a grinning Kai standing in front of him, "oh Kai hello, what are you doing here?" She tries to keep her eyes open but she's visibly having a hard time doing it. "Oh hello, I was being nice so I carried you back home," he was waiting for her saying something, but she blacked out already.

Kai shakes his head and laughs under his breath, then he walks out of her bedroom, he stands frozen next to her bedroom door, watching her sleeping, he could just watches her forever, but no he screwed up last time, he almost killed her, he let out a small sigh then shut the door lightly and head back to the door.

Evalynn wakes up around noon the next day, she saw the glass of water and a tablet next to her, she took the tablet and saw a note next to it, 'there's orange juice and pancakes in the fridge, Kai ;)' She smiles at the note, and walking out of her bedroom. "Thanks for last night," she texts Kai, he responds immediately, "no problem, how' the hangover?" She saw the texts and starts typing, "not as bad as I thought, see you at the rave?" She sent the message, which he responds to immediately again, "sure, can't wait." Then she saw a notification from twitter, 'cobrakai1972 followed you just now,' she chuckles then followed him back.

She brushed her teeth and showered, "blueberry pancakes," she smiles then bring them to the microwave and set the timer. Evalynn sits on the bar stool and starts having flash backs again, last night she had those nightmares again, she was running from someone then he grabs her thigh and scratched her, she remembers she was running along the stairs with him chasing behind her, but the stairs are endless, she felt her legs getting heavier along with her breath got more shallow, then he grabs her from behind and tossed her from the stair, her head hit the floor, she felt blood coming out of her mouth her nose, then suddenly blood was oozing out from the floor, she screams as she starts drowning in the sea of the blood, then she woke up.

The timer made her jump back to the reality, she opened the microwave and took the plate out, then she poured herself a glass of orange juice. She only finished half of the pancakes, then she went to the living room and turned on Netflix trying to distract herself from those flash backs.

Evalynn watched a few movies before she got sick of them, she went to the grocery and grabbed two bottles of tequila that she's planning on to drink tonight. She figured if she's gonna suppress her emotions, maybe some tequila can help, 'what do the kids say these days, drink your feelings away, yea that,' she thought and snorts at her own thoughts.

She puts them on the kitchen counter after she got home and those flash backs are coming again, she closed her eyes and tries to push them away from her mind, she starts pacing around her house as if she's on fire. She felt the walls around her starts looking fake and blurry, it's like she's still dreaming. "No no, I'm still in my dreams," she whispers and starts panicking.

Evalynn rushes to the drawer and took out a small pocket knife, she starts cutting herself, "why I don't feel any pain?" Her hands start shaking even more, tears strolling down her cheeks, then she placed her forearm on the table, place it there, and she cuts herself deeper, much deeper this time, "ow," she threw the knife away as she feels the pain.

"Ok, I'm not in my dreams, calm down." She ordered herself then wash the wound with cold water. Evalynn walks to the couch and collapsing on the couch, she tries to do some deep breathe, it helps a little, at least she's not shaking anymore.