Project Eruri Remastered

Chapter 11

Levi blushed and turned his head as his heart fluttered. Someone to live for? The stupid giant would be the death of him yet. Levi watched the smoke trail from Erwin's nose as he exhaled. Smoking always reminded him of titans. How they would smoke when injured. Or how their dead bodies just... evaporated. Levi shook his head. He didn't need to think of that now.

"You okay?" Erwin asked.

"Yeah, sorry." Levi said. "I was just thinking."

"What of?" Erwin took another drawl.

"Just..." Levi hesitated. "The other life." He said.

"Ah." Erwin studied his face. What was the man thinking of Levi wondered. Erwin finished his cigarette. "Come with me." Erwin led him back into the house and into his bedroom. It was relatively sparse, just like the rest of the room. Erwin grabbed a notebook off the beside table and motioned for Levi to sit on the bed beside him.

"I keep having weird dreams." Erwin said, opening the book. "Ever since I was a kid." Erwin's neat handwriting filled the pages. He flipped to a page where two overlapping wings were drawn. The wings of freedom.

"Are those...?" Levi stopped himself. Did Erwin remember some things?

"I always have this dream." Erwin said. "I'm riding a horse through the fog. Huge bodies litter the ground around me. There are some sort of... boxes at my hips. People are screaming, dying all around me..." Erwin rubbed his face. "And I always see this emblem on a green cloak." Erwin laughed. "I'm sorry, I sound like a lunatic."

"No, no." Levi placed a gentle hand on Erwin's shoulder. "You're fine."

"Is it..." Erwin's voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "Is it from the other life?" Levi sat for a moment. Should he tell him? Could he tell him? Would it only make things harder for him? Levi sighed. Erwin deserved to know.

"Yeah." He said. "It is."

"At least I know I'm not crazy." Erwin sighed in relief. "Thank you."

"Of course." Levi said.

"Do you have these dreams too?" Erwin asked.

"Yeah." Levi looked at his hands. "Just a lot more... detailed." Erwin grabbed Levi's hand and kissed it.

"Listen," he said. "I know I don't remember much, but I know it was a horrible place. But you are here now and it will all be okay." Levi smiled up at him. He wrapped an arm around Erwin's neck and pulled him down into a gentle kiss.

Erwin smiled at him and looked out the window. "It's getting late." He said.

"Yeah." Levi looked at his hands. He really didn't want this day to end.

"Would you like a ride back to your dorm?" Erwin asked, closing the notebook and standing.

"Sure." Levi followed him out, grabbed his bag, and climbed into Erwin's car. Erwin drove him the short distance to Longden.

"Thanks for tonight." Levi said.

"See you tomorrow for lessons?" Erwin asked. Levi leaned in and kissed him.

"For sure." Then Levi was running up the steps to the building. He and Erwin had almost... he blushed as he entered the building. He didn't want to push Erwin into sex. Not at all. But he did want to finally be with him in that way again. In the other life their lovemaking had been brief, desperate sessions in broom closets and barns.

But now... Levi shuddered. Now they could take their time. He longed for Erwin's touch the way a man dying in the desert longs for water. But he couldn't have him. At least, not yet. Levi held out hope that one day he would, but he wasn't going to rush things. He wanted to do this right.

Levi relayed the night to Hange and Petra, leaving out some embarrassing details, before curling up in bed and drifting off.