Love Grows (Love series: book 3)

Chapter 5.

Scott 

Knocking on Riggs's front door, Gail and Riggs asked to spend a few hours with their granddaughter today. I think Gail is missing Remi so much, I mean she has been there for her every day since the day Ella brought her into this world.

Now that Ella is still refusing to see or speak to her mom, Gail hasn't come around the house either. The only time Gail has spent time with Remi in the last few weeks is when I bring her over to her house, or Riggs house for that matter.

I know that Ella is hurting and that Gail did betray her when she lied about Riggs being Ella's father and keeping that from her for such a long time, especially when Riggs came to know Ella and our family.

And I will always support what my wife wants, but I hope that eventually sometime soon, she might be able to forgive her mom because I know that Ella misses her every day. 

"GRANDMA. PAPA" I heard Remi excitedly shout as soon as the door opens.

When Ella and I told Remi that Riggs was her grandfather just like Grandpa George. She asked what she should call him, as she already called my dad Grandpa. And well I and Ella were a little lost because neither one of us really knew our own grandparents on either side of our family, so we didn't have an answer for Remi.

But Riggs stepped forward and told Remi that she could call him Papa as that is what he used to call his own grandfather and after that, it just stuck.

"My sweet girl, I've missed you" Gail announces and gives Remi a quick hug before pulling back and flicking her eyes to me.

Riggs steps forwards and smiles down at Remi.

"Your Grandma has made some of those fruit sticks you like so much, let's go and get some," He says to her which earns him a grin so big from her.

"Yay...Bye daddy" I barely heard her say before she grabs his hand and pulls him away.

"Bye sweetheart," I say mostly to her back, once she and Riggs were out of slight, Gail looks up at me sadly.

"How is Ella?" She asks me, keeping my eyes on my mother-in-law.

Gail and I, we've had our moments in the past, there has been broken trust and a lot of disagreement about me, I know that, and I know that it took a long time for me and Gail to be civil again when I came back into Ella's life.

Because I was the asshole who broke her daughter's heart, but we've come a long way since then, and I can't really have an opinion on this matter between her and Ella, they need to work it out themselves.

"She's doing the best she can...you know Ella" I answered honestly.

Everything these last few months have definitely taken a toll on Ella. And she's such a strong woman, that sometimes she forgets that it's okay to lean on someone, that she's not alone.

It's also really hard to see her so hollow, a shell of her once bubbly self. And I feel helpless that I can't do much to help her, other than just being there for her and showing her that she is not alone, that I am here to help carry her in her darkest days, and that I am her safe place and always will be.

"I wish she would just let me in... I want to be there for her, now more than ever, especially since the attack" She sighed sadly.

"I know you do Gail; you've just got to give her time. I mean if she can forgive my mother, then there is definitely hope for you". I replied, trying to help.

Gail lets out a hollow laugh before patting me on the arm.

"Thank you for trying to make me feel better, but at this point, I'm not so sure Ella can ever forgive me for lying to her, even if I'm beyond sorry that I did".

"Don't give up hope yet, she's starting therapy today. And that might help her open up a bit more" I said.

Ella did as she said she was going to do, and she found a therapist that deals with trauma and anxiety. And her first session is today, she needs this, it's a long road ahead I know that, and Ella knows that but it's a road worth putting the effort into, and I will be there every step of the way with her. 

"That's good, that she's getting help-;" Gail started to say but broke off and looked me dead in the eye.

"Just tell her that I love her. And that I'm not going to push, I will wait for her, until she's ready to talk...please" She adds in a hollow whisper.

Nodding my head, "Of course I will, I'll pick Remi up around five".

"Don't worry about it Riggs, will drop her off. You just look after our girl".

"Okay thanks, just tell him not to ring the doorbell," I said, the doorbell is one of Ella's triggers, it sends her into fear and starts the flashbacks off for her.

Everyone who we know and who knows what happened to Ella knows not to ring that stupid doorbell anymore.

"We know Scott" Gail says sadly to me, nodding my head and sighed. Before saying goodbye and headed out to my car.

Climbing in my car and just sat there for a moment, just letting my own thoughts take over.

I don't want to be selfish; I want to be strong for my wife because she went through so much more trauma than I did, Kylie was the one who wanted her out of the way, Kylie shot her father, Kylie broke into our home and attacked her, almost killed her and would have if Ella didn't first.

And when I think of all that she has endured, my feelings and my worries and my little trauma doesn't even compare to it.

When I think of how close I came to losing her, to not be there for her in that moment, the moment she needed me the most, I can't even let my brain go there to those thoughts. I worry about Ella every time I walk out the front door now, I worry about her mental state, I worry about her every minute of every day since the attack.

I also have this guilt eating me up inside, because all of this happened because of me. I don't know why Kylie thought I was the one who caused her all the pain that happened in her life. I don't know much about her motive behind it all.

Ella, she told after it happened, that Kylie got it into her head that years ago we spent a night together and that I got her pregnant, then she was tricked into getting rid of the baby.  But it wasn't true, the first time I met Kylie was when I went to Ella's office, I vowed to never lie to Ella again when we got back together, and I've kept that vow I haven't lied to her and I never will.

But for a few days after the attack, I saw that flicker of doubt in Ella's eyes, even though she never mentioned it, I think she still thinks about the sad story Kylie told her that day, and if it could be true.

That I don't know what to do about, because I know it's not true, but I don't know how to prove that to her.

As much as I love being married to Ella, and I don't regret marrying her the day I did. I do think sometimes maybe we should have waited; emotions were running high those few weeks after what happened, even more so with her mom's lies.

Which brings me back to more guilt, did I do the right thing marrying her when I did? I am enough support for her now? I have my doubts, and I personally think the one person she really needs through this is her mom. The one person who has been there her whole life, but she's stubborn and won't talk to her.

This brings me back to one simple question that is always running though my mind lately.

Can I  be her rock, like she's has always been for me.