Chapter 29.

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Ella

Looking around the room when I woke up it was clear I was in a hospital. But I didn't know why I was, everything is a haze, fuzzy and I want answers.

When I saw my mom, I thought everything was fine, but she was with a man I didn't recognise and then she asked me if she should get Scott for me.

And I don't know I just lost it, because everything was unclear and wrong and then I was confused as of why she would mention him after all these years. I was anger that she would even say his name.

But there was a look of sadness in her eyes when I said that, like her heart was hurting by me saying that about him. Which makes me more confused about all of this.

"Hi, honey how are you feeling?" Snapping out of my own thoughts and turned to look at my mother.

"Why did you ask me if I wanted you to get Scott? Where is Remi? Why is everything fuzzy?" I cried out all these uncertain questions at her. She looks at me just as my heart rate starts to rise and the machines start to go off.

"Ella. Breathe honey, you need to stay calm. I'll tell you everything you want to know, but first focus on your breathing" she says to me, nodding my head and took a deep breath in and out several times until the machine stopped beeping.

"That's good, keep breathing" mum soothes me.

"I feel like I'm missing key information. Like I'm forgetting moments that I shouldn't-;" I broke off and looked at her.

"I am right? Are their things I'm not remembering mom"

Mom looks at me sadly for a few seconds and wipes a tear from her eye.

"Yes honey you are. Do you want me to tell you about them? I don't want to overwhelm you" she replies. 

Nodding my head, even if I hear things that don't make sense or things I feel uncomfortable with, I have to know. Because this feeling like I'm missing something is torture, I feel like a part of my soul is messing and I don't know why.

"Please mom I need to know everything" I cried.

"Okay then. To start off the man that you saw me with when you woke up is Riggs. He's my partner but he's also your father" she starts off.

"My father?"

"Yeah, he's been in your life now for just a under a year. Along with your half siblings, willow, and Max"

"Where's Remi mom?" I asked her, I'm shocked about leaning I have my father in my life along with a brother and sister, but I can focus on that until I know my daughter is okay.

"She's with Oliver and Amanda" I listen as she says names of people, who I think I should know but can't place, but Oliver sounds familiar.

"Oliver....Scott had a brother named that. Is she with him?" I asked.

"She is. Remi loves Oliver and his wife Amanda. You planned their engagement party and their wedding. Amanda is your best friend"

None of this makes sense at all. To me the last time I saw Scott's brother was back when he came to visit, while we were in college, and he didn't have a wife. And now mom is telling me that I know him again, that his wife is my best friend, and we're close enough to each other that my daughter loves them.

And if I'm close to Oliver, does that mean Scott is in my life once again.

Which I can't believe because I swore that I wouldn't ever let him close to me again, that I wouldn't let my heart-beat for him again.

Rubbing my temples and sighed, before looking back to my mom.

"Tell me about Scott" I said.

"He came back into your life about two years ago. It was by chance really, Amanda hired you to do the engagement party and Oliver found out about Remi, then you decided to tell Scott about your daughter together"

"He's in her life? Is he a good dad? How I mean I swore to never let that man around me or my child ever again" I argued with her.

"Oh honey so much has changed since then. Yes when Scott first came back into your life, you were sacred and weary of him leaving you both again. But day after day, moment by moment he started to show you just how much he has changed and grown over the years, and Ella he is a different man now. And a wonderful father to Remi" she explains to me.

"So we co-parent her? And she's happy?" I questioned.

"Ella, Scott is your husband" she announces, looking at her in utter shock. And shook my head. No that can't be right, I mean he can't be my husband.

How do you forget if you married someone. If you are someone's wife.

"No... that can't be right. How I mean I would remember something that important wouldn't I? And Scott, he hurt me so bad, how did I forgive him enough to marry him?" I let my tears fall as I take in all of this madness and missing information in, bit by bit, piece by piece.

"You two fell back in love, if was a whirlwind romance again. You both have grown so much apart as people, but also together as a couple in love" she says.

"Why I am here? Did I have a accident or something like that?" I asked changing the subject because I can't even think about being married to Scott right now. Because that was a dream I though I lost years ago.

"No nothing like that. You had complications with your pregnancy"

"My what? I'm not pregnant" I shot out, fleeing my flat stomach.

"Not anymore you're not. You gave birth to twins over four weeks ago. Their here in NICU, a boy and a girl" she answered me.

Shaking my head and cried harder, no that can't be true. You don't forget giving birth or having children.

"Mom you're telling me that Scott is my husband and that not only do with have our daughter but we have more children together. Children I don't even remember carrying or feeling them grow inside of me or have even seen with my own eyes. That can't be true mom it just can't be" I broke down sobbing.

Mom pulls me into her arms and runs her fingers through my hair, like she did when I was a little girl every time I got upset.

How can't I remember giving birth again? Or remember my own children? I'm their mother, I suppose to remember them.

"Shhh... Ella everything is going to be okay" mom whispers to me, shaking my head and pulled back from her to look her in the eye.

"What if it's not? What if my memory never comes back? How do I live like that not remembering the love you say I have for Scott, the last few years of Remi's life? Or how the twins came to be" I cried at all the uncertainty swirling around me.

"Doctors are confident that your memory will come back, your brain just needs time to recover" She explains to me.

Mom pulls out her phone and swipes before placing it on the bed next to me .

"Here are some pictures from the last few years, Remi as she got older. You and all our extended family that has came to be over the last few years. You and Scott together and even some of you pregnant with the twins-;" she broke off and smiled at me sadly.

"Have a look through them, I'll give you some space' we all love you Ella" she adds before getting up and leaving me alone in room.

Taking a deep breath and picked up the phone and began swiping through the pictures that are of a life, that wished more than anything to remember. 

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