part thirty one.

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It's been two months since Veronica died. It hasn't gotten any better and I haven't found a way to deal with it. Johnny and Pony have found a way to forgiven me which I thought was impossible, so maybe there is a way I can cope, maybe it's possible. Coping doesn't mean forgetting though. I'll never forget her, how she saved my life whilst taking her own. I still have nightmares, they get progressively worse each passing night. Sometimes, I choose not to sleep because I can't handle the image of the crash replaying in my own head. I hate it. I can't remember the last time I got more than an hour of sleep. Due to the obvious reasons, I'm not staying with Veronica's dad anymore, so Darry is letting me stay with them. It's a full house, but I'm not complaining, these are my favourite people and I feel safe here, I kinda lost that sense of security after Ronnie. It feels good to have even a sliver of that back. School is tough, it's been two whole months and people haven't stopped asking me what happened, or telling me crazy stories they heard, Ponyboy scares them off though, so I guess that's good. Even though Johnny says he forgives me for all my wrong doings, something tells me he doesn't fully. I don't blame him, I kissed his boyfriend on top of all the other shit. Whatever, he will eventually, I hope. I really do, I miss him. I miss the three of us.

-January Grant

I set down my notebook. Darry says it helped Pony to write when he went through some things. I guess it helps a bit. I had been staying in the extra room at the Curtis house, I have some blankets and pillows coming together to make a bed. It's honestly better than nothing, I'm just thankful I won't have to interact with that monster of a father Ronnie has... had.

"You ever figure out why the fuzz were at that ol' arcade?" I heard Steve exclaim from downstairs. I listened in curiously.

"Nah. We didn't get caught remember? They wouldn't tell the newspaper nothin'." I heard Soda reply faintly.

I lowered an eyebrow, what were they talking about?


-Ponyboy-

I heard Steve and Soda chatting in the kitchen, something about the arcade, I had forgotten about that, it was a while ago. I examined their moods and decided it was a good time to tell them about what came to our door.

"Hey..guys?" I stepped in.

"What's up Pone?" Soda turned around to face me.

I waited a minute, was it really a good time? I was procrastinating.

"This... was at the door yesterday." I handed a small paper-shaped package over.

Soda examined the package carefully from each angle.

"Who is David March?" Soda grew a look of confusion.


-January-

Too suddenly, I heard the name David March. My heart skipped a beat, it seemed superhuman-like how fast I sprung up and headed down.

"Let me see." I dashed into the kitchen and snatched what Soda had in his hands, I read the front. David March, and a familiar, homely address.

"T-this is Veronica's dad." I could hardly believe it.

Soda and Ponyboy exchanged looks that I caught in my peripheral vision.

We were all speechless for a while, creating a deafening silence. I think it was a mental mutual decision that I should be the one to open it.
I carefully tore open one side, making sure not to tear anything inside, I slipped out what seemed like five or six papers. I hesitated slightly before pulling them out all the way and examining the first one.

*sorry for the cliffhanger heheh*

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