As You Are // D.M.

DEVIL'S ADVOCATE

Song: Streets by Doja Cat (idk just felt right) and Devil's Advocate by the Neighborhood 

Armena Riddle-Lestrange 

I laid in bed that night, making a mental pro and cons list of why it was a bad idea for me go into Draco's room. I felt like I was playing mental tug-o-war; don't go, stay, no, go, stop. My thoughts were completely against me, they wanted me to suffer in this Parisian apartment with Draco Malfoy sleeping one all over. I didn't know how to explain to him all of the fucked up shit that was Armena Riddle-Lestranges' life. I wanted Draco Malfoy. I have wanted him now for eleven years, since I first saw him in Charms class that day.

Every single part of my being wanted to storm in there and let him rip off my clothes. Let him give me the never ending pleasure that he promised me. To remember what it would be like to have him hold me as we were making sweet love. To feel his lips against mine just one more time. 

I didn't know how to tell him. 

I didn't know how to make him see that this was all so fucking complicated. No, this was more than complicated, this was a push and pull between what was right and what was wrong. I wish that I hated him. I wish that I could have hated him with a burning passion. I used to think after everything, after all the heartbreak and the year that time would heal and my love for him would turn into hate. It didn't though, after everything— I couldn't.

"Fuck" I groaned into the pillow, as I flailed my body around like a child having a tantrum.

That kiss triggered something inside of me that had been dormant for quite sometime. It was like a spark at the end of a match, lighting the rope of a dynamite. It was maddening to want someone so badly but yet if I touched them, if I put my lips on them then my best friend would die.

Oh fuck.

I shot out of bed, my eyes wide like saucers. I jumped out of bed and ran into the living room. The morning sun was just rising and I knew it would be too early to reach her, but I had to make sure. I picked up the muggle telephone on the wall and dialed the number that Potter made me memorize by heart. After a few rings, a groggy male voice answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Oh fuck, thank Merlin you picked up!" I hissed into the receiver, "It's me— Armena by the way, if you didn't know."

"I figured, do you know how early it is Lestrange?" Potter muttered.

"Yes, I do" I hissed, "can you do me a favor and go wake up you darling wife?"

There were sounds of cursing and static on the other end. I could hear Pansy let out a whine before she picked up the telephone.

"What do you want?" she muttered, "I was just having the most marvelous dream." 

"Oh thank Merlin you're still alive" I breathed, slapping my hand against my heart.

"Why wouldn't I be—" she paused, I could picture her brown eyes popping out of their sockets. "Holy— did you? Did you and Malfoy fuck?"

I shook my head as a response, but then remembered that she couldn't see me.

Fucking muggle technology.

"No we didn't fuck, Pansy" I hissed, cupping my hand around the receiver. "There was sort of an intense kiss and heavy petting. I stopped it though and now I think he's pissed."

"I would be livid!" she screamed, Potter muttered something in the background that was inaudible. "Armena, I am alive and well— now please, for the love of all things, go into his room right now and shag his brains out."