Quora/Reddit Forums

Q51: What is something you will never understand?

by: Anonymous

How my father, while fighting for custody of his son from the child's alcoholic and abusive mother, was instead accused of sexual misconduct concocted by a paid off stepdaughter (there was proof of payment and witness to discussion of the plotted plan). My father had no criminal record - not even a parking ticket. Incredible dad, hard working, patient, honest and loyal.

Stepmother... alcoholic, physically abusive while drunk (son was afraid of her), mentally abusive when sober (to clarify, she wrote bitch all over my wall when I was a teenager. As soon as this happened, I moved the hell out). She abducted the son when he was an infant because she got mad at my dad when he asked her to get help for the drinking. Years later, one night, she got arrested while driving drunk - in the midst of their custody battle. In her drunken ramblings she told the police he was abusive (he wasn't. Wouldn't hurt a fly though I wish to he'll he had hurt her sometimes.) She came home belligerent. He filed a restraining order against her, she filed one in return and instead, the system restrained my father from his own home. She wasn't even on the lease. Again, the system failed him.

In fear of losing custody of her child, came the conspiring. You see, she had recently won a lawsuit against her employer for racial discrimination because she alleged that they made racial comments about my father and their child. What makes this more terrible, is that she deliberately led these conversations with her own comments to bait them and recorded their replies. We know this because she used to brag about it. This same settlement money was magically gifted in a partial sum to one of her adult children to concoct a story to help her win custody of her youngest son, my father's son. We know this because she said this in front of the child and because my father didn't want him to go through any more pain or stress in allowing him to testify, he trusted the system to provide justice because he knew he was innocent.

That wretched horrible lie cost him months of his life spent in jail for a crime he never committed. He died just a month after, and I am certain it is because of a broken heart.

This was a man who took this woman in when she was homeless. Helped her get back on her feet. Bought her clothes, food and shelter. Treated her other children like his own. To this day, even after the lies, he's considered dad to them. All he wanted, was for his son to be safe. And he gave his life in return. Literally.

This happened, because his lawyer and hers were later found to be having an affair.

This happened, because a judge saw the color of his skin and made an assumption. I'm left to make this assumption because how else can this possibly make sense?

This happened, because the judicial system fails and while it is meant to protect those who live in fear, it is unfortunate the system cannot help fathers who are trying to protect their own children.

I will never. Ever. Forgive them for what they have taken from my brother. The greatest father anyone could ask for. I will never forgive them for what they have taken from my son - a grandfather who absolutely adored him in the short month and a half of life they spent together.

What I hope is that somehow this story can help widen our eyes to the possibility that it's not so simple, clear, open shut, or cut and dry.

And if there's a judge out there who's sifting through a case load of 100 or more, please remember that inside of every case number are sides to every story and people whose lives will be impacted for lifetimes to come from your decision.