How Do I Say I Love You?

I won't stop

Why is it that our minds are racing but our bodies cannot keep up? We think so much and can't even comprehend how much we really know. Our minds are as endless as space I guess.

And this is where my dilemma begins.

As I laid next to Izuku, my mind was already racing, before I even opened my eyes. I could feel my whole body and I could already smell the petrichor from outside. The room felt stuffy yet so comfortable. Like a blanket. A shiver ran from the top of my head all the way down to my toes. (Petrichor is like one of my favorite words ever)

I was itching to get up and start my routine, but I couldn't seem to move. My body ached, scratches decorating my back. My lips were probably bruised and my hands were strained. I felt as though I'd gotten no sleep rather than the few hours I'd actually gotten.

My hands felt around for Izuku and I found him quickly. He was sprawled out on his back, his entirety exposed to me and me only. He was shivering though, and pulled his hands to his chest.

I quickly understood that he was cold and pulled his body to mine. Skin met skin once again and I could not get over the electric feel of it. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach and flew down my legs.

I pulled myself closer to him, kissing his forehead. He groaned in his sleep, turning his head upwards. I smiled and said, "I love you."

He smiled, his eyes still shut. I felt his hands wrap around my back, holding tight. "I want you to love me until the day I die. I know that I will love you until I die." I paused for a second, thinking about what I said. "No, I won't stop loving you. I'll love you even when I am dead. When I am nothing but a memory."

I felt tears well up in my eyes but I blinked them back. "Though I haven't told you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you and you only. You are the only one that I ever imagined spending my days with. I want to hold you, kiss you, and bask in your presence forever, okay?"

I felt foolish for saying all these things while he slept. But I had to. Whether he was asleep or awake, I had to say it.

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I must have had fallen asleep again because I woke up once more because Izuku was getting out of bed. My hand quickly reached up to grasp his shoulder. Sleepily, he glanced back at me and said, "Oh, you're awake?" His voice was hoarse and he moved cautiously.

I shifted so that I was sitting next to him, my face buried in his shoulder. I pressed my lips to his shoulder, kissing the back of his neck too. I yawned and said, "Good morning, Izuku~" He happily purred, "Did you sleep well?"

I ruffled his hair and said, "Of course I did. I was next to you the whole night, idiot." I took his hands and brought them to my lips, kissing them gently. He giggled and said, "You have to go back to Recovery Girl to get that redone, you know."

He was talking about my feeding tube. I shuddered at the thought but I nodded. This was my consequence, but it didn't matter because it was him.

"Hey, I know I might not say this alot, but I love you Izuku. And I will never stop loving you." He smiled and kissed me softly. "I love you too Katsuki."

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After throwing on some clothes and putting on some quick deodorant, I hurried out of the dorms. I had chosen a hoodie so that my shoulders would be well covered. I felt so sore, but I had to hide it. If we were caught, I'd be in a load of trouble.

I tried to walk slowly to make my doom seem farther away. I could already hear the old woman barking at me and her assistant would just stand in the corner, confused.

As I reached the door, I felt a hand grasp my shoulder. I whipped around, unsure of who it was. I felt my heart beat ten times faster as I readied myself to blow them away. My fist was clenched until I saw that Zachary was there.

The guy looked all cheery and stuff so I frowned and said, "The thing fell out." His expression turned annoyed as he furrowed his brows and rubbed his temples. "Of course it did."

I stepped into the room, almost gagging at the smell of hand sanitizer. I was beyond sick of it by now.

He had me lie down on the infirmary table and I clenched my fists again. "Okay take a deep breath."

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I walked back to the dorms with "The food dude 3.0" in hand. I hadn't thought to bring my backpack and I felt stupid for it. As I went though, I noticed that winter was finally coming to an end and that flowers were blooming on the trees.

Soon, the entire campus would be covered in flower petals. Pink would cover every pathway and would pollute the rooftops. And that was when the idea sparked.

"I have to bring Izuku here."

I could already see his face full of excitement and joy as he watched the petals float through the sky. It made my desire to kiss him in that moment grow even more. I just wished that he was there.

"Oh what am I doing? I could get him right now!"

(Sorry this was a shorter chapter. I'm trying to come up with ideas of what to write in the plot next. I have a few choices but I need your feedback. There could be an out and about date event, stay in the dorms date, movie night, some jealous angst, or something of your own choosing. If you want to give some feedback/ suggest something to happen next, please comment!)