How Do I Say I Love You?

You left him

I woke up alone, something I hadn't done in a very long time. I had thought that maybe it was just a dream so I tried going back to sleep. After a few minutes, I realized that it was real.

I sat up, looking around my room for him just in case. But there was nothing. I kicked off my sheets and stood up, going to the balcony.

But where did he go?

I sighed, holding my head in my hands. He never leaves like that, never. I took a deep breath of the earthy air. The balcony was damp beneath my feet and water dripped from the balconies above. It must have rained in the night.

I tilted my head towards the sky to see the soft rays of light peek through the clouds, only to receive a drop of water on my cheek. The old hag used to say that they were the kissed of angels. Like I'd believe that.

But sometimes, I did believe what she said, just so I could stay hopeful. So that I could make it through each and every grueling day.

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When I went to his room, he did not answer my knocks. I even called his phone fifteen times, yet he did not respond. I began to worry and as the time for classes to begin drew closer, I still had not seen him.

I sat in class, my leg bouncing rapidly and the tube up my nose was becoming increasingly uncomfortable. Even though I was trying my best to not be anxious, I could only feel it digging at me from the inside.

I needed to know where he was...

I expected for Aizawa-Sensei to enter the room in homeroom, but suprisingly it was Present Mic-Sensei. He went on about how Aizawa-Sensei was on a mission and that he would be substituting for the day.

Something seemed awfully suspicious but my mind could not put any pieces together. Through the classes, I expected to hear Izuku muttering behind me, but it was eerily quiet. It made me sick and I wanted to go to see Recovery Girl a few times.

But during lunch, I got a phone call from Aizawa-Sensei. I anxiously picked up, digging my fingers into the cloth of my pants. "H-hello?"

For the first few seconds, I seemed to not hear anything except for two words. Words that did not belong together.

"Izuku....hospital."

I didn't feel my phone slide out of my hand. I didn't feel much of anything for a second or two. All I knew was that something was horribly wrong.

I ended up meeting Aizawa-Sensei at the front gates, but he was beaten and bandaged up. Now my mind was racing, needing to see Izuku. I prayed that he was alright, instead of machines being hooked up to him, keeping him alive.

The car ride was the longest ten minutes of my life. I stared at the back of the seat in front of me, sweat rolling down the back of my neck. I felt feverish, hallucinatory too.

Voices rang in my head screaming, "HES DEAD! GIVE UP! SUCH A LOSER! YOU COULDN'T PROTECT HIM!"

I could see myself standing at his funeral, all eyes on me. I could hear whispers of the things I used to do to him at the memorial services. I could feel his mother slap me after I came to console her. Her screams rang in my ears. I could feel the sting spread across my face and into my chest.

"Bakugo...come on."

All of a sudden, I was back in the car, my cheeks wet with silent tears. Aizawa-Sensei was standing next to my door, holding it open. He looked grim as he watched me step out of the vehicle, eyes looking down.

He lead me through the large hospital, the smell of sanitizer stinging my nose. Though I could tell he was quite injured, he walked with his head high even though he had a slight limp.

Neither of us spoke, unsure of what to do. I looked into rooms as we passed them and saw who was inside.

A mother holding her crying newborn to her other amazed children. A sister laughing at a joke that her brother made as he got his leg put in a cast. A young man crying as he hugged his mother goodbye as the rest of his family mourned her death.

Seeing such emotions made me feel more dull. Like there was nothing left of me but a hollow shell of the boy I used to be.

A gentle squeeze on my shoulder made me turn my head to a room on the opposite side of the hall. Aizawa-Sensei nodded towards the door and said, "He's in there."

My heart was now beating out of my chest, pulling me towards the door. I took a few shaky steps, struggling to open the door. I quietly pushed it open, fearful of what might have happened to him.

But he was calm, eyes closed. He laid in the hospital bed, a few IVs in his arm. He had a few cuts and scratches but other than that, he looked entirely fine.

"Oh Izuku..." my knees gave out and I fell to the ground. A sharp pain shot up my arms from the impact but I crawled closer to him, kneeling next to the bed. I drew in a shaky breath, trying to hold in some sobs and said, "I-Izuku...you're o-okay."

I slowly grabbed his hand and brought it to my lips. I kissed the scars over his hands, squeezing him gently as I did.

"Katsuki?"

I looked up and saw him, eyes open now, looking down at me with a confused grin. He looked beyond tired and said, "Everything is fine, Katsuki."

I stood up, snatching him in a hug as I sat beside him. "Why didn't you tell me where you went? I called you fifteen times, Izuku!"

I squeezed his hand tighter and mumbled, "I was so scared....I thought you had...left me." I felt a hand in my hair as he said, "I love you Kacchan. I didn't mean to hurt you."

He looked to Aizawa-Sensei before continuing. "I was called on a mission to save a little girl. An innocent little girl. But I couldn't tell anyone as not to com...compromise it..."

He turned pale and his eyes became half-lidded. "Izuku?" His head started to loll back again onto the pillow and I saw him give me one more look before closing his eyes again.

"Babe, wake up." I gently squeezed his hand, soon gripping onto it so hard that it shook. "BABY WAKE UP!" I grabbed him by his shoulders, about to shake him awake.

'PLEASE DON'T TELL ME THAT HE JUST DIED. PLEASE WAKE UP! IZUKU GET UP! STAY ALIVE!'

A tight force wrapped around my body, dragging me back. I felt the air in my lungs being forced out, my throat was being crushed. It felt all too familiar. Don't leave me alone with them again!

THE LOV

My eyes went wide and I felt my heart quicken. I cried out in fear, thrashing to escape. I could see Shigaraki kneeling in front of me, his wretched hands drawing nearer. My hands were burning, exploding as I held them in front of me.

Then I felt a hard slap on my face. I was pulled back into reality and Aizawa-Sensei was in the place of Shigaraki.

I gasped for air and clawed at my throat where I could still feel Dabi's hand crushing my throat. The taste of blood was sharp on my tongue and I guessed I'd bitten it.

I just had to get out of there.

(And there's the big part I guess. I was going to use a little date for plot but I'll save that for later. This chapter was when Midoriya had to go to save Eri. I changed it up a bit though and made it so that Midoriya was actually a bit more banged up than he was in the canon series. Also, he's fine next chapter so don't worry. The video at the top is my favorite y/n × character  playlist so if you have a comfort character, it's perfect for you. Probably. Idk)