Chapter 14

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*****WARNING, ABUSE AND OTHER SEXUAL CONTENT AHEAD*********


Sitting on my bed with my favorite book, Pride and Prejudice, In my lap, my mind wanders to my past. Although my mom preferred drugs to her own child there were parts of my past I cherished, for example my 6th birthday she took me to the fair. Now the main reason she took me was to meet up with her drug dealer behind the ferries wheel, I still had an amazing time. I spent hours on the go karts, and spent what seemed like hundreds at the time in the arcade. Moments like these I won't ever forget as they were the only real moments my mother showed any love towards me.

My mom and dad looked like the perfect couple to the outside world, always smiling, hugging calling each other cute little pet names, on the inside, at home they were completely different. I remember when I was 7 just before mom overdosed, I was in the kitchen playing with my tea pot set when I heard moaning and groaning coming from the living room, being the curious child, I was I got up and walked inside. On the couch, was my mom and dad fucking, I just stood there not knowing what was going on, I thought he was hurting her if I'm honest but that was until my mom looked up and caught my stare. You want to know what she did? She smiled at me and continued bouncing up and down on dad.

"We have company honey." I heard my mom say to dad, dad turned his heads around to look at me, he continued fucking mom, if not faster this time knowing I was watching. They then stood up and walked over to the wall. I was so confused as to what was going on, me being a 7-year-old and not knowing what anything really was. I remember dad saying to mom: "Here now she has a better view." I tried to leave but hearing my father shout at me to stay terrified me so I turned back around and looked over at them. The moaning continued for about 5 more minutes until I heard dad say: "Here it comes, slut." then he dropped her and walked out of the room.

I ran over to mom and asked if she was ok. She smiled at me and said "In a few years he will be doing that to you. You will know if I was ok or not." then she got up and left. I didn't know what she meant at the time, but as I got older, I began to realize, growing up after mom died was hard, always having dad there to beat me and grope me was what causes my depression today. I won't go into too much detail about what he did, you probably have already guessed by now anyway. 

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