My tears...

stop the insecurity

WIN’S POV:
I realize my hand was under his shirt caressing his abs, I quickly pulled my hand away and walked off, but he caught me again. “where do you think you go after you made me hard?” he asked as he hold my wrist. “Why do you care where I go? Go back to the hot chocolate girl you were kissing and leave me alone” I said and he chuckled

“Do you really think I would like someone else after I got you back? Nonono, that girl was annoying and drunk, Geez I never thought you would get drunk on hot chocolate” he said and I laughed “well that’s the first time I’ve heard that” I said and I didn’t realize he holds me in his arms.

“Win, would you come back to me and starts over again?” he said and I nodded “then never break up with me or cheat on me” I said and he nodded “never” he said and hugged me
“Stay with me forever, because I won’t ever let you go again” he said and broke the hug. Suddenly his phone went off ‘hey babe” the man said and I stood there heartbroken again.

‘not even a minute together and I’m heartbroken already. How could I accept him this easily.’ I thought and started to walk away, but then he grabbed my hand, preventing me leaving, I tried to get free but he was too strong and his grip tighten. “Well bye baby” he said and hung up.
‘why does he do this? Does he want to see how pathetic I am?’ I thought. “Win, why are you leaving. I was just talking to my best friend ” he said but I shook my head. “I don’t want to feel insecure anymore”  I said and he stood there in confuse and shock.
“So we are over again? I’m sorry for making you insecure, I’ll leave you alone, please live happy” he said and as sad tears left his eyes.  “Does that mean you’ll just leave me because I feel insecure? So you wouldn’t make me feel safe when I’m with you?” I asked and he stopped walking.
“I don’t want to leave you, but I want to make you feel safe, I want you to be happy and I want you to love someone without feeling insecure” he said , I felt my heart thump

‘he thinks of me before thinking about himself’ I thought and walked up to him, I took his hand and intertwine our fingers. “then make me feel safe, make me happy, be the one that I love without feeling insecure, I love you, so take away my insecurity” I said with a smile, he looked at our hands and smiled at me ‘I’ll do my best’ he said and we walked back home.

“but you know, do you know how to take my insecurity away really fast?” I whispered and rubbed my knee between his leg  “AHH win”  he moaned quietly and grabbed my hands and ran to my house.

Soon as we got in he threw me on the bed and rips off our clothes as he bites me. His teeth scratched my nipple as I arched up. I felt like being devoured by this wolf.
…
Soon I dropped my head back in the pillow as I panted. I looked at Bright as he put on his ripped clothes. “that was fun Win.” He said, it made me wonder if he used me as a toy or not. “Hey, yes I’ll be there soon, I miss you too” he said thru the phone, making my heart explode from pain. I quickly rushed to the bathroom and locked myself in.

*I was a toy, I’m the biggest fool ever, this didn’t take my insecurity, it made it increase, it made me believe I was the stupidest person in the world. * I thought and looked in the mirror where my reflection has tears running over his face.

Soon I heard the door open and closed I cried hard. I wish I never met him again, I wish I never had sex with him, but I was too late, this was my fate, getting used over and over again, feeling pain for the rest of my life.

Suddenly I heard knocks on the door, I cleaned my face and open the door. “Win are you ok?” he asked in worry, *wow he’s good at acting. * I thought and nodded.  “Mae just called, she wanted us to come for dinner, she said she missed us, so let’s go” Bright said and I looked in confuse.
“one more round Win? I bet your insecurity did leave but increase” he said and I looked at the ground. He took my hands and lifted my head,
“I love you baby, you know I love you, so believe me when I say that I won’t like anyone else after I got you back again” he said and I nodded. He gave me a short kiss and gave me some clothes.
“You want me to help you” he asked making I blushed  and I quickly shut the door behind me. I looked at the mirror and found myself smiling. I took a fast shower and stepped outside, but once I was out the bathroom, Bright wasn’t there anymore. Tears formed in my eyes and I chuckled.

“it was a lie, his mae didn’t invite us, he probably went back to that hot chocolate girl.” I said to myself as the tears kept streaming no matter how many times I wiped them. Every tear shows my one sided painful fake love. every single tear show me how pathetic i am, how stupid i am and all my hope flown with my tears over my cheeks.

“Win why are you crying” Bright said panting with a bouquet flowers and a cake. ‘those were for his new girlfriend.’ I thought and he came closer. “Win, I won’t lie to you, mae really called, besides it was almost 6 p.m. and all shops were about to close.” Bright said and put away the bouquet and flower before he hugged me.
“baby please believe me.” He said and I nodded. *I really need to stop feeling insecure* I thought and hugged him back.
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