Chapter 11 P2 - Charlie

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I turn around again. I'm going crazy. I kick off the covers and turn on my back with a grunt. Why can't I sleep? I hit my head in my pillow and push my hands against my eyes. Fuck this.

I sit up and pick up my phone. I open some messages from the boys and then something strikes me. Jay is also online. My fingers float above her name for a few seconds. You know, it can't get much worse than this.

Our chat appears on my screen and to my surprise I see that she is typing. So I wait patiently and bite my nail. I swipe away from the chat, otherwise she'll think I'm a stalker.

Ping. I have to put in a lot of effort not to look at her message right away.

I don't know if you're still awake, but I can't sleep. - J.

With a grin I read the text again and again. I have doubts about what to return.

Well great, I'm wide awake. - C

Are we cursed? - J

I'm almost convinces we are. - C

Again and again I type a message but decide not to send it and when half an hour passes, I can longer contain myself

Hahaahahahah, Andrew's head tho .- J

Jay. - C

Mmm what? - J

Come to my room. - C

I see how she reads it, types it and then disappears from text message. I close my eyes and hit my head against the headboard. Fuck, I knew I shouldn't have sent it. I am almost ready to throw myself out the window when I hear a soft knock on the door, for a moment I think I have imagined it, but then I hear it very softly again.

I almost jump out of bed and quickly walk to the door. I get myself back together before I open the door. I stare into two green eyes, somewhere I see that she is a bit nervous. Without saying a word, I step aside and close the door behind her.

When I turn around I see her walk across my room, she looks at some photos, lift a few books, but she stops at one specific photo.

The photo that was took right after I got my motorcycle license. 1.5 years ago, it was the only thing that helped at that time.

My breath lingers as I make my way to her. Jay keeps looking at the picture even as I run my fingers over her arms. "You can get a ride if you want," I grin. She stays still and keeps staring at the picture. "What do you think?" I whisper in her ear.

"I didn't know you have a motorcycle license." Only now does she look at me.

"Well, there's still a lot you don't know about me." I gently press my lips against her shoulder. I don't have to say anything. she's already turning around. I stare into her eyes for a moment before leaning in on her.

"Like," she whispers as she moves back a bit so that our lips don't touch. She knows I struggle not to close the distance.

"Jay..." She doesn't give in. Fine. "I play guitar and piano."

"You sing."

I roll my eyes. "I don't sing." Jay grins.

"You sing." This girl.

"I have a motorcycle." Out of nowhere I pull her against me, hear her gasping softly. "And there is a girl that I really like." Her eyes find mine, a smile breaks over her face.

"Look at that," she says, moving her head so are lips are inches apart. "I knew that already." I grin and break the last bit of space between us. My lips touch hers and just like before, fireworks go off in my stomach. It's crazy to admit I like her, I've never had feelings for anyone.

Don't get me wrong, I've had girlfriends, but none of them made me feel that good even during sex and now Jay and I are kissing only kissing.

Usually I was the one who got dumped and to be honest I didn't care, even if the person in question had cheated on me or was kissing someone else in front of me. Now I am 100 percent certain that if Jay kissed someone else in front of my eyes I would knock the teeth out of that person's mouth, I couldn't do anything to Jay.

A relationship was hopeless, I didn't think it made any sense that people married, what was the use? But now with Jay, god I would like nothing more than for her to be my girlfriend and those thoughts startle me.

I break away from her, my eyes hold hers as I grab the bottom of her shirt. Ask for permission with my eyes. I know she's nervous, I notice that, her trembling hands, her rapid breathing, gasping for breath. And then she nods, which gives me enough encouragement to keep going.

Her shirt slowly goes over her head, I keep my eyes on her face don't want to push to far, pull her towards me with one hand while the other lets her shirt fall to the floor. My lips find hers again and I feel her sigh on my lips. Man she's perfect.

"Charlie..." My hands find her ass and I hear her breath linger in her throat as I lift her. I move my lips to her neck and gently lay her down on my bed. I do everything slowly, don't want to go too fast, because I'm afraid that if I move to quick it will startle her and she rebuilds her walls.

"You're beautiful, Jay," I say against her skin. I move down with my lips, kiss her chest. All I want is to make her feel good. "So beautiful."

When I reach her stomach, she stops me. I doubt if it hurts because of the bruises or because she doesn't want to go any further, so I come back up and kiss her jaw. "Charlie," she mumbles again.

"Mmm?" I hold back when I put my lips back on her neck, I think I will be killed if I leave a hickey.

"Charlie stop." I immediately withdraw when I hear the panic in her voice. I lift myself up so that she doesn't feel trapped and look at her.

"Are you okay?" She swallows with difficulty and averts her gaze. "Jay." If she still doesn't speaks and keeps avoiding my eyes, I sigh. "Did I do something wrong?"

She looks at me immediately. "It's not... I..." She looks away again. "This is stupid."

I sit up and drop my hands into my lap. "Jay, talk to me." I lift her chin so that she looks at me. "Did I do something wrong? Do you not want to...?"

She looks away from my eyes and sighs. "It's just..." She closes her eyes.

"What?" I say a little softer now.

"I... I've never..." She sighs. "I've never done it." A relieved sigh rolls over my lips. I grab her face between my hands and she looks into my eyes.

"You're perfect Jayden Miller." She chuckles. "I'm serious, you're gay." That makes her laugh. "You've never been on a date and you're still as pure as you can be."

She shakes her head at me. "What's perfect about that?"

"That's perfect because you're going to see everything and I'm hopefully the one who will show you everything." She smiles and leans forward. "I'm going to show you the moon, Jay." It's a whisper for our lips connect. It is a short kiss, but it is enough, I notice how she does not want to go any further, she's not ready and I respect that.

"Charlie..."

"It's okay, I can wait." I drop down next to her and pull the covers over us. "Come here." She rolls over to me with a grin and puts her head on my chest.

"Thank you." I smile when she puts her arm around me and closes her eyes. Even if she asks me to wait a year, I know it will be very difficult, but I would wait. Then I have to let my sexual frustration out in a different way.

My eyes slide to Jay. I think she's already asleep. I kiss her on the head and close my eyes. It does not take long to be absorbed into a peaceful sleep and for the first time in a long time I am not terrorized by nightmares.

I sleep until the sun wakes me and I become aware of the most beautiful girl ever lying in my arms and who's still sleeping. A sense of calm flows through me when I look at her and my chest warms. She doesn't even know what she does to me.

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