When you die

Dont call me nice

I woke up the next morning with a stinging in my arm. The events of last night came flooding back to me head. I decided I should probably go to the rest room and check on them.

I got inside and rolled up my sleeves. 'Man I made more than I thought' I thought to myself. I counted there were at least 14 on each arm.

"*sigh" I rinsed my arm under water to make sure the slits would stay clean and not get infected.

Hey yuuujiiii~ no not now please.

"Please I just got up." I whined.

C'mon Yuji I shouldn't have to tell you. You know you deserve it so c'mon.

"Yeah yeah I know just shut up." I said.

I picked it up. 'He's right. I deserve this." I said picking up the blade.

I looked at my arm for a second deciding if I should.

'Im already to far now. Might as well keep going.' I thought as I said put the blade down on my wrist.

As I made the first slit I thought of Junpei. "Im sorry." I said.

Tears started to well in my eyes and I didn't even realize that I carved what I just thought.

Blood was dripping from the deep cuts reading 'I'm sorry' I just looked at it and cried more. I broke down. Sliding down the side of the wall to the floor.

"J-j-Jun-p-p-pei, I-it-s-s-s~ my f-fault. I-I-I. The f-f-finger - you-r m-moms de-ea -th." I kept crying. "P-pls-ease for-for-forgive- me."

You don't deserve to be forgiven~  sukuna hissed.

"I know" I said.

You deserve the pain~ he said.

"I-I know" I replied.

C'mon keep going~ he said.

I could feel him smirking through his voice. I grabbed the knife and added 'junpei' to the end of my sentence.

'I'm sorry junpei.' My arm read. I watched the blood drip from my arm. I couldn't feel sad anymore I was just empty.

Not a second later the effects of what just happened hit me all at once. I slump down against the wall and begin to cry looking at my bloodied wrist.

I soon came to my senses and decided I should clean them as I'm not trying to die...

I washed my arm once more and than fixed the wrap on my head. I walked out down the hall and plastered a small fake smile on and opened the door.

Nanami was drinking coffee and Gojo had some iced tea.

"Hey good morning Yuji." Gojo said.

"Morning." I said my voice cracked a bit.

"How you feeling this morning?" Gojo asked.

"I-I'm ok" man that was so unbelievable.

"Really?... well ok. I told nanami about your head injury. He said he wants to look at it to make sure it's ok."

'Your kidding' "oh really. You don't need to do that Nanami."

"Yeah but I wanna make sure it's not to deep and that you didn't get a concussion." He said.

I backed up. "Look I-".

"Why are you walking away, I'm just trying to help." He looked at Gojo who slipped behind me and grabbed my wrists.

"Chill out Itadori. He's just gonna check your head." Nanami got close to my head and began to unravel the bandage.

I felt defeated.

"What the hell?" Nanami said.

"What is it??" Gojo asked. "There's no injury. Not even a scar."

He said braising his fingers on my forehead.

"He-he. I guess it healed... he, how weird." I said.

"Yeah kid were not stupid." Nanami said.

"Where's the real injury that caused the blood?" He asked getting really close to my face.

"I-I." I started. "C'mon kid. Why did you lie. What caused the blood? Why won't you tell us."  Nanami said.

"I-I-I-I" "c'mon kid. We're is your injury? Don't make us have to check your whole body." Nanami continued.

I began to hyperventilate " Sukana healed it leave me alone!" I yelled.

I looked at Gojo than proceeded to kick him in the stomach making him let me go.

I ran out as I heard an. "Itadori." From Nanami and a "let him be" from gojo.

I ran to the basement and began to calm myself from the obvious panic attack taking place.

I began to scratch at my arms making the cuts from earlier bleed again. The pain calmed me down and when I was about to get up I heard a voice say.

"Itadori?!"