The next day
I was on set, avoiding Tom as much as humanly possible. Trying to distract myself from my current feelings towards him. Constantly telling myself that I don't like him. He keeps trying to catch me on set in between scenes, but I just run away as fast as possible before he could catch up or I pretend to get a call and he walks away not wanting to interrupt. It's hard to stay away from him though if I'm being completely honest with myself. I love being around him. He makes my day so much better just from his presence. But I need to keep those thoughts out of my mind. I don't know why I'm keeping myself away from him instead of telling him what's up. I think it's just to protect myself. I don't want to get hurt again. Ever. But, I may also have to realize that I can't avoid getting hurt. It's going to happen no matter what I try and do to stop it. I'm human, it's just bound to occur.
I walked up to the set we were filming a scene at, knowing that I was going to film and then leave as soon as I could. Film the scene, run away before Tom can catch you. But after a couple of takes, it was getting harder and harder to run away from him. In between filming he would come up to me trying to start up a conversation. I didn't know how to respond so I was extremely blunt with my responses. Replying with simple head shakes and nods, or 'no' and 'yes'. I could tell he was worried about me. I could see on his face that he wanted to ask what was wrong but didn't know if he should pry.
"Y/N?" He asked. I replied with a simple hum, "Are you okay? Did something happen?" I replied with a head shake, "Fine, I give up." And with that, he walked away.
I felt kinda bad for ignoring him. I barely looked at him, mainly keeping my eyes on the floor. Z kept giving me sympathetic smiles. But that's the thing. The main reason I don't tell people about my past is because I don't want their pity. I'm not weak, I'm a big girl that can get past her problems without people trying to express their concerns or giving me those 'I'm so sorry' looks. I hate them. I hate the attention being on me all of the time. Especially when it's that type of attention.
I didn't need to be on set for any scenes so I left. As quickly as possible might I add. I went to my safe place. A place where all I had to focus on was the soothing sounds around me. Ones that took me out of bad moods. A place where I didn't have any negative emotions. A place where I felt safe. A place where I felt nothing could stop me. Or, it was the place where I could actually hear my thoughts, get a hold of them before they made me freak out. The place where I feel my calmest.
Word Count: 527
A/N
This chapter was short so I decided to just publish it. The next chapter should be decently long.
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Learning to Love Again - Tom Holland X Reader
Fanfiction"Are you going to keep in touch with him?" "I don't know. I don't think so though." "C'mon Y/N! Don't do this to the poor guy." "I know, I know. But I don't know what else to do." "Ummm, talk to him...?" The voice she said this with was the 'are you...
