Let Me In || Ticci Toby x Reader

20 || Walk

I get up early to Toby knocking at my door. The sun has yet to break over the horizon. My clothes are already laid out and ready for me to dress. Toby waits as I do so. And when I open the door, he is there all ready to start the day. Goggles and mask pulled up with his hatchets hanging at his waist. He holds a backpack out for me to take, adjusting another one onto both of his shoulders.

"Put a change of clothes in there. I've already packed some necessities. Your axe is waiting by the door."

I bring the backpack into my room and stuff a change of clothes in. Rummaging through, I rearrange what is put in there. Clothes at the bottom, a pocket knife, flashlight and matches swaddled in a blanket in the middle, food and water on top. There's a small first-aid kit in the front pouch next to a compass and toilet paper. A sleeping bag is strapped on top, keeping everything weighed down.

"Know how to use a compass?"

"I'm not stupid."

"What?! Really? Never would have guessed," Toby says sarcastically. I smirk.

"Yeah, shocker, I know. Come in and close the door."

Toby follows my instructions and sits down on my bed. I go into the bathroom, knocking on the door to make sure no one is in there. Looking in the mirror, I see someone I almost can't quite remember. This isn't the me that I used to know. The person I knew wasn't a killer. Now there stands one, getting ready to kill again. I avoid eye contact and brush my teeth hastily. After rinsing it off, I put it in a plastic bag to go in the backpack. My hair is quickly brushed with some unnamed brand of brush and deodorant applied before tossing both items in the backpack as well.

I sling the backpack over the shoulders, following Toby downstairs. No one is wandering around as we leave. It feels like the place is deserted. Though I imagine they are all either still asleep or getting ready for the day.

"Before we leave, stick close to me. I already know the trail. We head south-east, leaning more towards the south if we get separated. Just use the compass to head back here if anything happens." Toby hands me the axe. I grab it from him, brushing my fingers against his as the axe is handed off. It is heavy in my hands. In fact, everything I am carrying is. Though I suppose that I will get used to it.

"How long is the hike?"

"Day and a half just going there, another day and a half going back. We are avoiding certain places people are more likely to catch us. I know a good place to sleep overnight."

I like this prepared Toby. He knows what he is doing, confident in his abilities. The work has been put in, the situation analyzed and the best route already mapped and planned out. I trust him. All I need to do is follow him and do my part. Besides, seeing him in this serious demeanour is kinda attractive.

We trek out into the snow. It looks like it will be a clear day out. The forest is already beginning to lighten as the sun starts to rise. Time doesn't matter. We work on our own schedule. All that matters is the amount of sunlight that may expose us. I evaluate my surroundings, making sure to not ignore what is in my peripheral. Trees covered in snow pass by as we continue onward. The occasional branch full of needles needs to be pushed aside. A path has been made, somewhat. There are footsteps imprinted in the snow, and I am thankful the snowfall was light this year. Still, I try and avoid getting snow down my boots.

Toby and I have light conversations as we walk, taking the occasional break. I liked learning more about him. And it is so easy to talk to him. We just hit it off naturally. I have no problem letting him into my life a bit. He has been asking me to do so for a while now, after all. Toby seems like a decent guy to be around, apart from the killing part. But it would be hypocritical of me to judge him for it.

I have learned that Toby and I don't have a big age gap. He is twenty, turning twenty-one soon. I do poke fun at him being older, calling him a dinosaur for being two decades old. He does make fun of me for still being in my teens, only for me to remind him it was only a joke and I will be twenty on my next birthday anyway. And though Toby never graduated high school, he thought about going to school for social work. He even asked me about my post-secondary studies, how hard the courses were, what I wanted to do, et cetera. It was all basic stuff, nothing going too deep.

For the most part, Toby and I stayed silent. There is an awkward tension between us. I want to say something, talk to him, but I don't know what about. And I can tell he wants to talk too. But eerie silence falls between us.

The sun arced over our heads. Soon, it will be dark outside again. Toby and I turn on our flashlights. Bright beams of light shoot out, illuminating our path and about a meter or so on both sides. I start walking just a little bit closer to him. I am not scared, mostly just wanting to stand closer to him. After a few more hours, we stop walking and head off the trail a bit. Leaning against a tree is a makeshift shelter. Logs lean against a pine tree, hardened mud and snow covering it all, leaving only an opening large enough for a few people to lie inside. Logs and kindling are tucked away in the shelter to stay dry. A few meters away is a circular hole with black ash inside of it.

"This is where we'll camp for the night." Toby puts his backpack down and starts to unpack. I watch him, following his actions. We place our sleeping bags side by side inside the shelter, removing the wood to use for a small fire.

"(Y/n)," Toby mumbles. I look at him, wondering what he is going to say. He looks at me, before turning slightly red in the face and averting his gaze. "Just like saying your name."

"Thanks, you have a nice name too... Toby."

Toby smiles and looks away. He stands up to grab kindling, placing it in the small hole. Using a match, it catches on fire and starts to burn. Small logs are placed strategically to help build the fire. Soon enough a larger fire gets going. Small sparks grow into larger flames burning at the wood. I start to warm up, urging Toby to do the same. We refuel ourselves, eating and drinking. Toby assures me that we will be grabbing more tomorrow.

"Toby?"

"Yeah?"

"What are your thoughts about me?"

"Well," Toby says, having to pause and think for a few seconds. "You seem very shy and introverted. But that could be because of your situation. I like that you can joke a bit with me, and don't take anything harshly. Overall, you seem like a nice person at heart. You are just trying to protect yourself. And to do that, you push people away and are tough. I want to get to know you better. You don't have to be scared around me. I won't judge you."

"Thanks." My cheeks feel hot, but not because of the fire. I feel that fluttering feeling in my chest again. We can barely even look each other in the eye. I use a twig to draw in the snow, making small little holes and lines with no order at all.

Toby isn't wrong. I do feel scared and am just trying to survive. Being in a house full of killers is unnerving. I need to stay strong. All I wish is that Toby is also telling the truth regarding being safe around him. Because I do want to get to know him better too.

"Now, let me flip it around on you. What do you think about me?"

"You're misunderstood," I start. This is my chance to let him in. I can tell him nice things, compliment him, even. "From what you say, you weren't dealt the best hand in life. Now, you are just being you. You want to talk to people and have connections, have fun with other people. You are friendly and have a decent sense of humour. But you also know when it is time to be serious. I don't feel scared around you. Overall, you aren't half bad. Despite being a killer and all. So for what it's worth, I'd like to get to know you better too."

I look over to find Toby already looking at me. He is smiling, mask pulled down. I stare at his lips, wondering what they feel like. My trance is broken by Toby reaching out to me. His hand jerks away to slap the side of his leg in a tic. We both giggle, and he reaches out again. His head leans in. My heart begins to race as I clue in to what he is doing. There is a hand gently caressing the side of my face. I close my eyes as I lean in. A pair of lips meet mine, and I feel fireworks going off in my chest, a celebration in my mind. As soon as we begin to part, Toby brings me in closer to kiss me again.