Let Me In || Ticci Toby x Reader

24 || Again

Yesterday, Clockwork stopped outside my door. She left a mask and a note at the door. I listened as she said a few words before opening the door to grab the things once she was gone. It was a plastic Halloween mask from a craft store covered in black fabric and black mesh covering the eyes. The note was in Toby's handwriting, only a few short phrases.

You were right. I want to talk to you.

It has been a few days since that night at the fireplace. Since then, I have been trying my best to distract myself. It hurts. I wanted something with Toby. We really hit it off, unlike anything I have ever experienced before. Now I potentially lost the only thing that makes me feel safe here. I have noticed that I am more on edge. More anxious as people walk by, nervous whenever I hear people talk. Toby hasn't even come by to talk to me. I want a bit of space, but I also want to communicate with him. Just so we can be on the same page. Now, it looks like he is ready to talk again.

The only thing stopping me from running to talk to Toby is that he hurt me. It was kind of like a break-up. But instead of communicating that, we just stopped talking. Ghosting, in a sense. There wasn't even a relationship in the first place. And while I could have made the first move to talk, I wanted him to come to me. If he genuinely likes me then he would chase after me. I never did think it would take a few days for him to want to talk to me.

Perhaps we'll talk soon. When Clockwork came by, she was telling me to get ready for an outing the next day. Everyone in the household would be going to town together for a supply raid. Basically just robbing a bunch of houses throughout the town. I should pack light and there will be an extra bag to bring with me. Toby will be leading, seeing as he is Slenderman's proxy. I just feel nervous seeing him so soon.

Now, I am prepping myself for the outing. The sun is hiding beneath the horizon, yet I can hear the bustling of people walking throughout the house. They are all trying to get ready. Someone stole someone else's bag, then another person loses something they need. It sounds like havoc. I, however, am just sitting in my room ready for things to calm down. Someone will knock on my door when everyone else is ready.

Toby yells from somewhere in the house that it is time to go. People start running over to where the shout came from. Heavy knocks at my door alert me that it is time for me to join them. I place the mask over my head, adjusting the wires that hold it against my face. The hood of my winter jacket covers the rest of my head. It is cold out, so I had to double-layer pants and wear an extra sweater. A scarf, hat, and gloves were supplied to me by Clockwork to wear.

A masked man is standing by the door. Deep blue mask with black mesh eyes and droplets of what I assume is black paint dripping down from the bottom of the eye holes. He waves me along. I follow suit, tightening the grip on my axe. Neither of us says a word.

Outside, the air is frigid. It bites at my exposed skin. Frost clings to every surface it can. While the forest looks beautiful covered in white, the associated cold is not welcome. We walk in a group down the main trail. Flashlights replace the sleeping sun to light the path. Toby leads, two other guys following close behind him. One of them happens to be the guy that snuck around to try and look at me a while back. The other I can only guess to be the one he was talking about. BEN and Jeff, if I can remember what Toby said correctly. Clockwork and Zero hold a little girl's hand and talk together. That only leaves the other masked man to walk at the end near me.

Every once in a while, Toby will look back over his shoulder. He locks eyes with me a few times. I make a point to look the other way whenever he does. And when the group stops for a small break, I avoid Toby as best as I can. Clockwork tries talking to me, introducing the little girl named Sally to me. Apart from that, I stay as isolated as I can. The other two boys look over with googly eyes, evaluating my appearance up and down. Though I see they are hesitant to approach me with Toby looming over them. His watchful eye dares them to bother me and see what will happen.

I deducted that EJ must be the other guy in the mask. I remember his name being mentioned, and I also remember him talking to me once. Chewing me out for being rude to Toby when I was trying to starve. We walk silently near each other as the group continues travelling forward.

The sun rises, the heat of it making the cold air only slightly more tolerable. It reaches its peak when we stop for a longer lunch break. Mostly resting our legs and warming up with a small fire. As the sun starts to fall, we continue onwards. We pass the little shelter as it starts to get dark. Yet the group goes forward. I try to ignore the blistering cold only getting worse as the day begins to turn into night. Flashlights once again light the way. Eventually, we get to a small opening I remember walking by before. Only then do we stop for the night.

The boys find wood to build a fire. I help the other girls set up sleeping spots. As we sit and eat, the group discusses sleeping rotations. I can only half tune into the conversation. Most of the day has been dedicated to walking. My legs hurt and my eyelids are heavy. The cold only gets worse every passing hour. I inch closer to the fire and try to huddle myself to conserve body heat.

Toby and I take the first shift of staying awake. Then EJ and Jeff take over. Clockwork and BEN after them. And Zero will take the last hour, being an early riser already. Only young Sally gets to sleep undisturbed throughout the night. While everyone else sleeps, I sit on the opposite side of the fire from Toby. He pokes and stirs the fire, adding the occasional log to keep it fed. I curl my knees to my chest and watch the fire. All that remains on my mind is the night Toby and I shared by the fireplace. How he gave me a gift only to reject the notion of us continuing our relationship.

"Hey, so uh, I see Clockwork gave you the mask."

I only nod, staring into the fire.

"Did you get my note?"

Another nod.

"Well, just wanted to apologize for that night. You do have a point. I'm just very inexperienced. And pretty nervous. This is the first time I've had anything other than a celebrity crush. So, I'd like to try giving us another chance. If you'd like."

"Do you know what bothered me most?" I ask, giving a brief pause. "What sucked was that you never bothered to tell me you wanted to keep it casual. I don't want to waste my time with something that won't mean anything. I'm struggling with finding something in life that I know won't disappear suddenly. That includes relationships. I don't need anything without any meaning right now."

"And I should have been forward with you about that. I've just been withdrawn from normal society for so long. I don't know how to do certain things. But I do want something with you. It's been a very long time since I've felt this way. I think I know what that click feels like."

"Then let's try things again. Aim for something more than casual."

"Okay. Nice. Because you are very cute being all elusive today. Very attractive."

I struggle to find something to say, cheeks heating up. Toby stands and walks around the fire. He sits next to me. His hand grabs the chin of my mask, lifting it partially over my face. He cups my cheek and brings me in for a soft and slow kiss.