⚠︎︎TRIGGER WARNING⚠︎︎ ⚠︎︎Nightmares/Night terrors, smoking, mention of mental illnesses, emetophobia, and angst.⚠︎︎ ♥︎
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♥︎
-Dream-
Your clothes were completely stained in dark red blood, it was under your nails, in the creases of your palms, and it was all over the knife in your hand.
"Y'know Y/n I didn't know if you were going to be able to do it. But I'm so proud of you" your mother whispered, pushing your hair off your shoulder.
In shock, you jumped back and turned to look at her. "D-Do what?" you questioned in confusion.
It didn't take long for you to notice the pile of bodies behind her, it was like a scene out of a horror movie.
Lying there was the team, their necks and wrists slit, blood now slowly dripping out their bodies. Their eyes were open yet they weren't breathing.
"I-I did this?" You asked shakily.
"You were so good. Ruthless... Merciless... Even when poor Spencer begged you to stop, you completely ignored him and SLASH HIS THROAT"
-End of Dream-
Your eyes shot open, and your breath hitched in your throat. Beads of sweat dripped from your forehead.
"Baby?" Spencer mumbled tiredly as he rolled over in bed to look at you. "You ok?"
"Uh... I think so... N-Nightmare" you exhaled rubbing your eyes. "I'm gonna get some air," you mumbled climbing out of bed and walking out the room.
You walked through the living room grabbing the blanket from the couch, you then walked over to the bookshelf and felt for the secret box of cigarettes.
You weren't a smoker, it had been a while since you had one, but you always kept a box if ever you needed one.
Smoking wasn't that bad in the BAU, Rossi smoked cigars, and Emily was known for having a cigarette on nights out.
Once you found them, you headed to the small balcony and closed the glass door, and sat down against the wall.
It was a pretty quiet night considering your apartment was slap bang in the middle of DC. The view from the balcony was really pretty, you could see the twinkling lights of the city, you could even see some of the famous monuments in the city.
Tiredly, you opened the packet of cigarettes, pulled one out along with the neon green lighter that you had tucked into the packet.
You put the brown end to your mouth and lit it taking a deep inhale to get it properly started. For non smokers, the thought of smoking something that doesn't taste or smell great probably seems disgusting, but that's not why you smoked, that's not why anyone smokes.
