Y/N's Diary (AoT Boys x Reader)

23: Firm Decision Time

I promised Levi and Eren that I would make a decision more firmly this time. 

It was a bit difficult thinking about this when Levi and Hange were torturing MP's in the basement. But I did take the opportunity to learn about Levi's past from some of Hange's soldiers. 

As suspected, it was tragic and full of violence. But it also made me realize just how little I knew about Levi.

I guess he never thought me important enough to share...

(y/n) entered just as Eren was taking off his shirt, him wearing just boxers, his muscled torso showing.

(y/n)'s mood was suddenly lifted. "Can I sleep with you tonight?"

"Of course," he responded softly, a soft sympathetic smile on his face.

(y/n) let out a deep breath, her shoulders slouching. She sat down on his bed, her head down.

"It was a bad night," he spoke, placing an arm around her, rubbing her upper arm with his hand. "Pissed me off too."

"Honestly, it wasn't even that... I've been in a secret 'relationship' all this time, if you can even call it one. I don't even know if it's worth it anymore. I thought it would be exciting... but in all honesty it's tiring... and burdensome. But more than anything it's the fact that as everyone wondered about his past, whether it was about his parents, where he used to live or whether he's had relationships, I was wondering the same things. I have no clue, Eren. Not a clue about any of those things. And I've known him for so long. That guy said he'd been with plenty of women but dumped them after a short while. He doesn't trust me with any of his personal information, at least not with any of the stuff that really matters. And I have asked him about it several times," she rambled, her breathing irregular. "He usually just evades the question somehow."

"I'm sorry, (y/n), I don't know the Captain any better than you do-,"

"Wait, that's not all," she now turned to face Eren, her eyes burning into his. "With you it's so different. It's not hard. I mean... sure we may have some issues down the road, but you and I share similar goals. We see eye to eye. There's no doubt in my heart that I'd be happy if I was with you instead."

Eren pursed his lips, not wanting to interrupt. His heart felt full hearing her compliment him.

"You've proven to me that you'd invest in me. With you, I can tell that you'd be in it for the long run."

"Yes, that's true." Oh shit... is she ready to finally make her decision?

Eren looked at her with a hopeful look on his face. (y/n) continued to stare in his eyes, as though wondering if she should say her next words.

"I think-,"

Think? He didn't like the word 'think' at all. And so, he interjected her. "You don't have to make a decision right this second. I hate to say this... but you should talk to Captain Levi about this issue first and see what he says. At least then you'll know for sure. Right now, it's all just hearsay and assumptions."

(y/n)'s jaw dropped. She knew how much Eren loved her. That's why she couldn't believe what Eren was saying.

"You're seriously telling me to go resolve this with Levi?" she said skeptically.

"Yes," he frowned. "Because I don't want this to be a spur of the moment thing. Like you said, I'm in it for the long run, and I don't want any hesitation on your part. It's not fair to any of us."

(y/n) now hugged Eren. He's truly the best. Do I even deserve him?

"Fine," she said. "I'll speak to him, and then I'll make the decision."