Chapter 1 🔪 The Belt Buckle

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"Cam? Hey, Cam, get up."

I awake, sweating, to someone gently shaking my shoulders. I open my eyes and see the concerned eyes of my older brother looking down at me.

"You were having a nightmare, Cam. I thought I should wake you up."

I shudder, remembering. "Thank you, Toby."

He makes a face at me. I stick my tongue out at him. He hates it when I call him that. That's part of the reason why I do it.

I sit up and look around Tobias' room. It hasn't changed much throughout my whole life. It looks almost identical to my room. I sometimes come in here and curl up with him when my nightmares are especially bad. I know it's silly, considering how old I am, but he always calms me down. I don't know if I would have survived fifteen years in this god-forsaken house if it wasn't for him.

I glance over at his alarm clock. Plain, like everything else in this faction. It reads 6 AM.

"Aptitude test today, huh?" I ask him. He nods. "What do you think you're going to get?" He shrugs.

I frown. He must be nervous. He never talks much when he's anxious. "What do you want to choose tomorrow, Tobias?"

He hesitates for a moment, then answers, "Abnegation."

"I asked what you want to choose, not what you feel forced to choose." I know that his life here has been living hell, just like mine. I don't want him to feel obliged to stay because of me. At least one of us should escape.

"Cam, I don't want to leave you with him."

"I can handle myself, Tobias. You should go where you want to go, not where I am. I'm leaving next year anyway."

"But-"

"No buts. Where do you want to go?" I know for a fact that he doesn't want to stay in Abnegation, with our monster of a father. I think I have an idea of where he does want to be, but I want to hear him admit it.

He hesitates again, then whispers, "If I didn't have you, Cam, then I would choose Dauntless. But I-"

"Tobias! What did I say about buts!"

We look at each other. For a second we stare at each other, then burst out laughing. It's been a while since I've laughed this hard. It feels good. Only my brother could make me laugh like that. He used to draw these laughs from me all the time, before my mother died, before Marcus began beating him, then me.

When we finally calm down, I continue talking. "If you want to choose Dauntless, choose Dauntless. Don't stick around for me. I'll tell you what." I smile at him. "I love Dauntless too. If you pick it this year, I'll pick it next year. Sounds good?"

He hesitates again, this time for a good half minute. "Alright." He says, slowly. I smile and hug him. He returns the hug with only a second of hesitation, wrapping his long arms around me and holding tight. "You want to walk to school today?" He whispers in my ear. "We have time."

I nod eagerly. "Alright then. Go get ready, Cam." He ruffles my hair and gets up, striding towards the bathroom, picking up his loose abnegation shirt and slacks from the dresser on the way in.

I sit in bed for a few minutes, listening as I hear the shower come on. Then, I finally get up and walk into my room. From the closet, I take out a gray dress and pull it on. Me and my brother have an agreement; he showers every morning, I shower every night. It works well, since we don't have to wait for each other to finish. I make my way to my dresser and comb my dark hair. I've just started putting it into a bun when my brother's deep voice interrupts me.

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