Don't leave me, my Love // Emily Prentiss X Reader

The one who ran away

TW: abuse, drug abuse, miscarriage, violence
From time to time I will add some songs that are associated with the chapter.

I recommend starting music when Y/N will be telling her story.
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We decided to drive in the morning so we have 1 more night at the hotel.

"You wanna talk?" Emily said as she saw me frustrated.

I felt better, maybe he didn't hit me that hard after all.

"Okay."

I sat on the bed, Emily brought me some water and found a place next to me.

"I'm sorry, I can't do it," I whispered.

"Can't do what?"

"This whole feelings thing," I looked her in the eyes, "I can't, it's too much."

"Hey, baby, start from the begging, I'm not following," she said trying to calm me down. She put her hand on my shoulder but I removed it. Her hand worked as a trigger for all I had inside.

"I don't wanna start, I can't do it, why don't you get it?" I yelled, "a couple of years ago I made a promise to myself to never open to anybody, last year only made it more clear. It will ruin people. I will ruin people. That's why I don't share, that's why I don't let people I care about in, people I'm falling in love with, I will destroy you and I don't want it," I shut up as I realized what I just said. I looked at the ceiling to stop myself from crying.

Emily: I was just sitting, I didn't know what to do and how to comfort her, she was yelling. At least she wasn't crying. I couldn't get even a clue what could make her feel so worthless and lonely. Or who.

"Okay, it's okay, I'm not fragile, you won't break me that easy," I hugged her and sat her back on the couch, "you can tell me everything, I won't let you fight alone."

She nodded and slowly started to talk.

"I was adopted when I was 6. It's wasn't a big family: father, mother and a son. Since I was 7 I was abused permanently by my foster dad and sometimes bother. I got an eating disorder. When I was 15 I got pregnant but I had a miscarriage on the third week.  So I knew I had to get out of there. As soon as I turned 16 I ran away. I lived in some abandoned house and studied hard. I didn't have lots of money, worked in a cafe as a waitress so I could survive. I got into college and then the academy. Books probably saved my life."

I saw how her shoulders started to open. She started to let me in. That was a good thing. But I felt like I was starting to cry. I wanted to destroy the whole world who did this to this pure girl.

"I started to date one girl from college. I didn't know how to love or how to give love. And she offered to move in with her, and I did because I didn't have anywhere to go. At first, everything was good, someone was watching over me, made sure I was dressed properly. After 1 year when she first hit me, I got scared. I didn't know how to get out, my expectations of love were ruined. I was with her until one day I woke up in the hospital with a broken rib," she sighed.

"Hey, I'm here," I grabbed her hand and hold it tight to remind her that she's safe. She continued.

"Last year I was undercover. I had to be the girlfriend to some guy who ran a drug cartel. And the first 6 months were great, I almost got him. But then I was exposed. I barely remember the next 3 months, I was drugged and beaten almost every day. He wanted to know who sent me. And one day I just exploded. I attacked one of his guys, took a gun and I was ready to shot them all but Hotch found me with SWAT. He took me to rehab and for 2 months I was there, going to therapy. But it didn't help so much. I still have nightmares almost every night."

She was telling all of this and I just couldn't think straight. How can someone go through so much trauma and still say that she's okay. I wanted to find that little girl and hide her so she wouldn't be alone, so she wouldn't have to suffer almost all her life.

Back to Y/N: As I finished I raised my eyes and I saw a tear falling down her cheek.

"I don't wanna hurt you like I would've those people," I whispered.

"You did what you had to to survive, you were exhausted and hopeless," she put her hands on my cheeks, "and you were alone. And I'm so sorry that happened to you. I can't imagine what it all was like. You're not alone now, Y/N, let me fight with you."

After those words, I felt tears gathering in my eyes. It was like all my pain was ready to come out of me. I laid down on her chest and felt her hand going through my hair.

"It's gonna be okay, baby, I'm here."

I cried until there was no water left in my body.

Emily: she'd been crying for almost an hour and I was hugging her tighter and saying "I'm here" from time to time. It was hard seeing her like this but today she showed me the part of her that she hid so well for so long. And now I could be there for her. And I will do everything to keep her safe. After some time I felt how her breath started to calm down, she wasn't crying anymore.

"Hey you," I said.

She raised her eyes on me, "Hey Em." That was the first time she called me Em. Most of the team called me like that but hearing it from her made me smile and I felt warmth in my heart.

"I'm sorry I yelled," she said without interrupting eye contact.

"That's okay, baby. Yell as much as you want if it's gonna make you feel better", I whispered and she smiled, it wasn't a happy smile more like a sad one. But it was sincere, "do you want some coffee?" I asked her and she nodded.

Back to Y/N: While I was waiting for Emily to come back I turned on some music. It was 'Keep you safe' by Lindsey Ray.  I'd never completely understood the lyrics, I guess because I'd never listened to it properly, but today it changed.

If you ever lose your way
And everything is out of place
I'll be there to make it all okay
I will light the path for you
I'll do all that I can do
To keep you safe

I felt empty inside, probably because of all the tears that just came out of me. But I also felt safe. That was a damn good feeling.

"So did you say you started to fall in love with me?" she sat next to me with a smile on her face and put cups on a coffee table.

"I guess I did say that," I was smiling without teeth.

"Good to know, cause I think I do too," and she put my head on her shoulder and laid her hand on my thigh.

"This one who ran away was my foster dad, " I whispered.

"What did you just said?" Emily said loudly.
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Here it is, revealing all the secrets about the past.
Let me know if it was interesting.

Also please don't be scared to ask for help. I know it can be hard sometimes, but once you do, it'll get easier. Let your loved ones fight with you.
If you need someone to talk to, you can text me on Snapchat eshakirova97