Chapter 29

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Rachel's POV

"You're really asking me that?" Alexander laughed and wrapped a towel around us. He sat us down on the bed and took the liberty of drying us off. I was straddling him, playing with his wet hair. His 5 o' clock shadow was casting a breathtaking look on him. One that I adored. 

I bit my lip thinking if it was good... if I was good. I've never done such a thing before. Alexander kissed my forehead and set me down next to him.

"You were amazing, princess. Never expected that on your first try. Where'd you learn?"

I giggle a little at his question contemplating to answer. I glanced at him from the side with heated cheeks. "Deana sent me link the other day."

Alexander pushed me back on the bed and hovered over me. Curiously he looked at me, "What link?"

I giggled some more unable to contain myself. "A porn link."

Alexander's eyes widened. "You were watching porn?"

"Only for educational purposes, obviously!" I swatted his arm playfully yet clearing knowing that porn was something I should have not been watching. Perhaps I should have read a steamy book of some sort to give me an idea. 

He squinted his eyes at me not liking my answer one bit. "Hmm.. obviously."

"What?" I asked as he pulled me over him so that I was now hovering over him. His hands were cupping my ass and lightly kneading the skin.

I leaned my forehead against his looking into his eyes. "Does that upset you?"

He had a look on his face that I could not decipher but I could feel his hardness poke against my lower stomach. Suddenly I felt a hard, stinging sensation on my ass and gasped out loud. Again, Alexander spanked my ass really really hard.

"Alexander! That hurts," I said strained and tried to pull away to get off of him.

A hard look came over his face and he smirked triumphantly when he spanked me for the third time. I squirmed fiercely because it really hurt but felt good simultaneously. How did he ever manage to do these things to me?

"Told you princess," he started whispering to me so softly, "You'll regret slapping me that day in the garden."

My eyes widened in realisation at his motive and then instantly closed when he shoved himself inside me in one swift go without warning.

*  *  *

The ringing of my alarm woke us up and I turned it off. I had to wake up extra early today for my presentation. My body was extremely sore, especially my ass. Alexander was merciless trying to prove his point to me. I don't think I'd be able to sit at all today.

Alexander moved in his sleep and winced in pain when he woke up. His beautiful teal eyes greeting me. He sat up and I could see the very deep, red scratches my nails had caused on his back. We were both writhing in an unexplainable amount of ecstasy last night.

He looked over at me with a lazy smile. "Good morning, princess," he said and leaned over to kiss my cheek.

"Morning," I mumbled and touched his back. "I guess we're even," I said playfully yet also pleased. He looked at me teasingly and pulled me closer to him as he laid back down.

"It's still so early." 

I hummed in agreement and rested my head on his chest, mindlessly tapping my fingers on his broad peck muscles while he had his arm wrapped around me securely.

"Alexander?"

"Hmm?" he mumbled with his eyes closed.

"How many kids do you want?" I ask excitedly.

His eyes shot wide open at that, alarmed at my question. "We're not having children, Rachel. I want no kids," he said with a firm voice as if he had known this all of his life.

Now it was my turn to look up at him incredulously. He had me utterly confused. "Why not?"

He sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. "Does there always need to be a reason? I'm allowed to say no to having kids."

I looked away disappointed. "I've always wanted children. Obviously not now because I'm still so young but I was hoping to have a family with you someday. I thought you'd want kids. You never told me otherwise."

He scoffed and laughed at my statement. "Well now I'm telling you. Children are out of the picture for us. A family is too much work. I do not have time for wailing babies and all that shit."

I lightly nodded to say that I understand where he is coming from, but I did not agree. "It is work but I'm sure every bit of it would be worth it. Wouldn't you ever like to see a mini version of yourself? Children bring a lot of joy to homes, like little Lilly for example." I really missed Lilly. It's a pity that I couldn't enquire about her seeing that I had contact with nobody.

"Rachel, I don't want children. What don't you understand about that?"

I moved off his chest and sat up crossing my legs in front of me, slightly wincing at the pain present within my whole body. "But having children with the person you love doesn't seem all too bad right?" I asked with hope. Maybe he just needed to get used to the idea and perhaps his mind will change.

I could see that Alexander was uncomfortable with this conversation. He looked at me sternly without any sort of warmth. "Well it's a good thing I don't love you and that I will never love you."

"You're a very beautiful woman, a good wife, a good cook and a great fuck. I'll give you everything but not children."

He abruptly stood up and left the room. I watched him leave without even sparing me a single glance. I sat on the bed baffled. So he didn't love me. My vision began to get blurry and warm tears suddenly escaped. I quickly wiped my cheeks and chided myself for being so emotional about this but what he had said hurt me. Did he only consider me to be beautiful, a good cook and great fuck who diligently performed my wifely duties? Did I mean nothing more to him?

I thought we were getting somewhere. I thought that there were things developing between us. Was it only me?

However, I guess I was also being naïve, he did say that he didn't believe in love.

I huffed in resign and closed my eyes for a bit. It was like taking 1 step forward and 2 steps back with Alexander.

*  *  *

Needless to sat today was absolutely horrible. Everything went wrong. My presentation was a complete disaster because my mind couldn't stop focusing on what happened this morning. I could barely present my designs and my dyslexia kicked in when looking at the key cards because of the anxiety and stress.

I drove back home in a daze still thinking about this morning. Everything seemed to be a grey area when it came to me and Alexander. I thought that maybe he was developing something for me, maybe he didn't just 'like' me, maybe it was something more. But it felt like cold water was thrown over me when he told me that he didn't love me.

I mindlessly got out of my car and went into the house not bothering to look if Alexander was around. I freshened up and got started on dinner. My concentration was non-existent as I cooked. I wanted this day to be over already. His harsh words kept on lingering in my mind like a broken record and I needed it to stop.  

I quickly got started on dessert but gave up halfway when I couldn't get the pie dough right. I left it as it was and started on my supplementary designs for submission tomorrow since I was sure I failed today.

Julia called to check in on me. I kept it quite short and ended the call since I wasn't great company at the moment.

Again, Alexander didn't join me in bed. I wasn't even sure if he was home. I was too tired to bother and was too hurt to even check if he was in his study. 

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