nine thousand miles | cazzie

eighteen

I walked down the streets, the bag of churros clutched in my hand. I walked especially fast, hoping to not be seen by Casey who I'm assuming, also left the cafe.

"Why did I come here, why didn't I just stay at home and not even come on this trip," I thought to myself.

"Hey..." I heard a familiar voice say and my eyes widened as I whipped my head around. "Um... where you off to?"

I took me a while to process those words and think of an answer. "Oh I... I went to get churros. I'm heading back now," I mumbled awkwardly. "I'm sorry how things ended with us..."

I sighed. "Nate, it's fine just drop it." He walked closer to me and I immediately stepped back. "I don't know what was going through my head when I did that. I was drunk and I lost control. I promise I'm not like that. And I really, really like you. I'm hoping you'll give me a second chance."

"Nate listen, I'm really confused about who I am right now. And I'm sorry but I'm just not attracted to you anymore. Also, I just broke up with someone," I said and he nodded. "Well... if you ever change your mind-"

"What the hell are you doing here!" Her voice cut him off as we both turned around to see Casey walking towards us. "Chill I was just apologising," He said and I saw Casey's face filled with rage. "Get the hell out of here," She muttered. "Casey it's fine, he was just apologising," I said.

"No seriously I don't know what your fucking issue is but get the fuck out of here before I make you."

Oh God, what is with Casey. I don't know whether I should be mad at her or be in love with her. Casey and Nate were now just inches away from each other and my brain finally told me to step in. "Casey I swear to God just leave it!" I yelled and I saw her face soften as she looked at me.

"Izzie-"

"No I don't wanna hear it. Just leave him alone," I cut her off. Nate looked between us in both anger and confusion before he scoffed and walked away.

Now it was just me and Casey. I turned around to start walking when she started to speak. "How could you even look him in the eye?" She asked and I stopped in my tracks. "People deserve second chances," I replied. "Not him."

"We're done with this conversation," I told her and she continued to stare at me.

It was already really late and the streets were empty. We heard the sound of thunder and I silently cursed, realising I didn't have an umbrella. "We're not done with this conversation. Look I know we broke up and stuff but if I see you around Nate obviously I'm gonna do something."

"And why's that?"

"Because I'm still in love with you. You can't possibly think I'm not."

There it is again. The clench in my heart. When I looked at her, all I remembered was all the times we shared together, all the kisses and the cuddles, all the banter, and constantly trying to skip class. Her eyes are so goddamn powerful.

The sensible thing to do was just walk away. Stick to my plan of moving on and forgetting about her. But Casey Gardner is right in front of me and I'm finding it difficult to resist the urge.

I ran towards her before smashing my lips on hers, shocking her immediately. She whimpered a little once our lips touched but we both sighed in unison eventually. I held onto her face, her shoulders, grabbed onto her hair, her jacket sleeve and any thing that could possibly bring her even closer to me.

She decided on resting her hands on my lower back, allowing me to do whatever the hell I wanted to. I felt that spark again, the spark I lost the minute I broke up with her.

"Does that stewardess kiss you better than me?" I asked, biting my lip and staring straight into her eyes, proud of how flustered I had made her. "You... you were there?" She asked.

I put my lips back on hers, slipping my tongue into her mouth and she groaned a little, pulling me further into her.

What the hell am I doing? My heart and my body wants this so bad. I want her so bad. Kissing Casey Gardner late at night in the middle of the streets of Sydney sounded like a great idea right about now.

"I don't wanna be the reason you don't do the things you wanna do."

I pulled away from her immediately, confusing her with the fear on my face. "I... I'm sorry..." I mumbled, turning around to walk away. Tears were threatening to flow down my cheeks.

Kissing her was the cure to all the hurt I felt this week and now that I couldn't have her anymore, I was back to square one. Feeling the raw and tender pain of not calling her mine anymore.

"Izzie wait!" I heard her say and I shut my eyes closed, trying to block her out.

"Izzie..." She whispered and I felt a tug on my wrist. I turned around and immediately backed away from her. "Casey please just leave me alone..." I whispered.

"Did I do something?" She asked quietly. "Yes you did Casey! You did everything!" I exclaimed, and she furrowed her eyebrows.

"Why can't I get you out of my head? Why is it that you're the only one I want even though I was the one that ended things? Why is it that every single thing reminds me of you? Why is it so damn hard for me to fall asleep alone every night? Just leave me alone! Let me fucking move on!"

"And what makes you think I've moved on?" She asked and I laughed humourlessly. "Clearly from what I saw at the cafe, you have."

"What you saw at the cafe is the exact example of me not being able to move on. I wanna get you out of my mind so fucking bad trust me, but I just can't."

I looked her up and down. "I don't want anyone who's not you..." She whispered.

I could kiss her right now.

"It's late," I mumbled before turning to leave.

When I entered my room, I saw Erika at the table, studying. Her face lit up when she saw me. "What took you so long?" She asked, walking towards me when she noticed the panic on my face.

"What happened?" She asked, concern filling her voice. "I... I kissed Casey..." I mumbled and her eyes widened. "What like our Casey? Casey Gardner?" She asked and I nodded.

"Wait what? How?"

"We bumped into each other on the street. I don't know what took over me but I just did it. And I loved it so much."

"Oh my God. Isn't that a good sign?" She asked and I shook my head no.

"It's scary as hell. I... I don't want anyone who's not her..." I mumbled, quoting what Casey had said to me.

Erika opened her mouth to say something when the door slammed open, shocking both of us.

Quinn ran in, out of breath. "Quinn what happened?" I asked. "Casey... her family is here. Her dad is here!"

Fuck. 

A/N time for some dramaaaa