John, Peter and Rose

Chapter Twenty One

The next morning John woke up feeling completely different. For days now he woke up with the feelings of love, happiness and excitement which were all brought on by the chance of being able to see Rose that day. Today, all those feelings were still there but were accompanied by guilt, fear, worry, anger and sadness.

Anger and sadness from knowing that his relationship with Rose was going to change. They would have to be more careful and see each other less often to decrease the risks of getting caught. Their relationship won't just be butterflies and rainbows anymore. It will always be overshadowed by a cloud of negativity knowing that Peter will find out any day now and they'll have to face how much they hurt him. Will their relationship be able to survive that?

Fear and worry knowing that Peter could catch them any day now. Once that happens, there's no way of knowing what's going to happen. He might be lucky. Peter might be understanding and will only be a bit mad for a few days and then they could go back to being best friends and he could even start being more public with Rose. But most likely Peter will not be understanding. He'll feel angered by the betrayal of his best friend who he has given everything to even going as far as risking his own life. When Peter gets really angered, he doesn't forgive he holds onto it for the rest of his life. He still hasn't forgiven the guy who called his mom ugly and swears to beat him up again if he ever sees him. He'll kick John out of his apartment and refuse to acknowledge him ever again. John will have lost his best friend and brother. His whole life will change if he has to figure out how to live without him.

Lastly, guilt because he knows what he did is wrong. He doesn't regret dating Rose he loves her way too much for that but he still feels guilty about it and to make it worst he had so many chances to fix it. He could've talked to him the second he found out that he was falling in love with her. Peter might've of understood more and let him date Rose if she shows more interest towards him. He could've told him the second that they started dating. Asked for his forgiveness and again Peter might've understood. But what he won't understand is lying to him for months. Letting him waste his time loving Rose when John knew that she would never love Peter back. These were all unforgivable and John hated himself for doing that to him. No one deserves that especially not Peter who has always been nice to him.

John was driving with Rose to their secret place by the lake and he knew that he had to tell her that Peter knew. He would rather be the one to tell her than have her find out by being ambushed by a furious Peter. He was scared of how she would react. Most likely she would feel the exact same way as John and know that their relationship is strong enough to survive this. But there was this little voice in John's head that told him that maybe she would end it with him since it would honestly be easier for everyone. No more lying and sneaking around. Or maybe she'll leave him because of everything he'll loose if Peter stops being his friend. He'll be homeless and broke. Would she really want to keep dating him? Of course John knew that their relationship was stronger than that. They loved each other more than they thought possible and they would get through anything as long as they were together but there was still a part of him that had doubts. She was able to convince Peter that she really liked him what if it was the same with him. What if he thought that Rose loved him but in reality she would never love him as much as he loved her. Maybe she simply loved his company but didn't love him enough to fight for them like he would.

They almost finished eating their sandwiches when John knew it was time to tell her.

I um I have to tell you something.

What's wrong?

Peter knows that you've been lying to him.

What? How?

He went to the diner last night to see if you were really working like you told him but obviously you weren't there. I tried to convince him that you were probably just with your family or something but he has his mind set on you lying to him.

Does he know about us?

Not yet but it's just a matter of time before he does. He's convinced that he needs to find out why you were lying, and he always gets what he wants. It could be any day now.

I mean we knew this day was going to come sooner or later right? I love you ok and I'll always love you. I know that Peter means a lot to you, and loosing him will be hard but I'll be with you every step of the way.

That's when John knew everything would be ok. Looking at her and hearing her say that she loves him makes him realize that as long as they had each other they could do anything. Yes, Peter figuring out will suck, and he'll probably loose him as friend for a while but he knows that he'll be able to get him back eventually. He'll just have to show him how much he and Rose love each other. He'll have to forgive him after that. He did what he did for love even Peter couldn't be mad at him for that. They'll be ok. He's confident about that.

I love you too, always.

John and Rose then shared another passionate kiss just like in every single book. The romantic scene where the main character feels like they've hit rock bottom but are reminded that they'll be ok as long as they have the person they love by their side. But unlike the scenes from a book their kiss got interrupted.

How could you?