"I kissed the scars" - JakeHoon

no.28

"Jaeyun" sunghoon said.

They were sitting down on the living room , jake looked at him , the way he said jaeyun brings him back memories,
"Yeah" jake said , "I remember everything now " sunghoon said , "what did you remember?" Jake asked him "the time that you needed to leave " sunghoon said and Jake's expressions changed ,looking at him "dont bring them back " jake said, it hurts .

"I wanna talk about us " sunghoon said ,  making jake to be curious "let's go out in the yard " jake said and sunghoon nods, getting up from where they were sitting and went outside , jake didn't want to talk about them when his mom is home , he doesn't know if they will support him if he dates a boy.  Going outside and they arrived at the back yard, it was pretty and green, you can see lots of plants and trees , rose and flowers everything.

"Wow" sunghoon said ,feeling amazed by it and jake smiles at him , they sat down on the swing that was like a couch . "So....what did you remember " jake asked him .

"Everything....the time where you talked at me first and to when you left me alone " sunghoon said , looking at Jake's eyes. "I didn't want to leave you.....you know that " jake said .

"But still....I was alone again " sunghoon said and sighs , it was hard for him to live because no one talked to him back then and he had problems with his mom , his mom was angry because her husband left her and she started to smoke and drink alcohol, she would hit her son everytime , Sunghoon would beg her not to hurt him but she still did , since sunghoon was young his mom would hurt him and yell at him.

Sunghoon started to get depression at the age of 16 and he still have depression, making him to lose interest in finding new people like jake , making him to hate himself, making him to kill himself because he didn't want to live .

"I didn't want to leave you....my dad took me with him....sunghoon..I never wanted to leave you , I had been looking for you everywhere and at the end I finally found you" jake said and held sunghoons hand , making their hands warm with love , making sunghoon to fall more harder for him .

He doesn't know if he should tell jake about him liking him , he doesn't know if jake likes boys , what if he doesn't, they will be awkward then and nervous around each other. Sunghoon sighs , wherever he have something to say he signs , jake have noticed this before.

He squeezed his hand making sunghoon to look at him "is something bothering you?" Jake asked him with a sweet voice tone making sunghoon to forget about bad things. Sunghoon shakes his head , he wanted to tell him that he loves jake but he couldn't do that yet.....he doesn't know if it's to early for that. "You can always tell me anything hoon " jake said .

Sunghoon laughs "what's with the hoon?" sunghoon said "nickname ...why... dont you like it ?" Jake asks , pouts making sunghoon to giggle "I like it " sunghoon said and gave jake a smile , jake smiled at him back .

It was silence , no one spoke as they swing , it is good staying beside someone who you love and want to be with them forever. Feeling like he is your soulmate. Sunghoon was looking at one flower and jake leaned in and gave a peck to his lips and went back to his place.

It shocked sunghoon, he turned his face slowly to look at jake beside him , jake was biting on his lips . "Sunghoon....I want to tell you something " jake said, not looking at sunghoon at all. Sunghoon hums , his ears turning red because of the kiss .

"At least look at me when you talk" sunghoon said to jake and jake smiles , a blush appeared in his cheeks . He looked at sunghoon.  "I don't know where to start " jake said , getting shy .
"Start where you're more confident" sunghoon said to him and jake nods , licking his lips because they become dry .

"Um.....you know how ...we have...kissed before" jake started to speak , sunghoon looked at him and nods "I've been with you those past days and I realized that I want to be with you for other days too and other weeks, months , years until we get old and die" jake said .

Sunghoon looks at him with a smile on his face. Nodding at him and jake continued his speech " I was so happy when I first saw you....I'm so happy now that you're with me and not alone " .

"Sunghoon.....I realized that I love you ....i love you more than you think i do ...i wanna spend my whole life with you " jake said and sunghoon looks at him , getting emotional about it. Sunghoon had been thinking that jake wont love him but here he is now confessing his love to sunghoon .

"I don't know if you have feelings for m-".

"I love you too" sunghoon said, cutting Jake's words in half . Jake looked at him , feeling his heart melt "I do love you " sunghoon said again . Jake threw himself into sunghoon and hugged sunghoon , he felt like crying but....

Why is sunghoon sad.

He hugged Jake back but he feels sad deep down his soul "I'm so happy.....we will be together forever...I promise " jake said while hugging him , sunghoon only hugs him back,  tears rolling down his cheek . "What if I die one day ?...will you be happy like this?without me?" Sunghoon suddenly said , braking the hug. Jake looks at him .

"Dont say things like that....if you die...I'll die too " jake said and hugged sunghoon again "dont think bad things when you're with me " jake said and kissed sunghoons shoulder, sunghoon hums .

After some times of them hugging, sharing their love to each other . Sunghoon thought of his mom .
"Jake.....I'll go see my mom " sunghoon said and got up . "I'll come with you " Jake said and held his hand , didn't want to let him go . "I'll come back ....I'll just say to her that I finally have you and I'll live with you " sunghoon said and gave jake a fake smile but he meant it , he just couldn't move his face muscles.

"Okay, I'll wait for you " jake said .

.

Thank you.