Something Greater (Something Great 2)

Chapter 50

Jen's POV

The hospital was only a short drive from Harry's house, but those five minutes felt like five hours when the whole world around me had stopped, and I was numb to all my surroundings.

He rushed me out the door as soon as I told him I was bleeding, and ran to the car turning it on before I even got inside it.

I could see the panic in his eyes, and our fight earlier seemed so stupid compared to what was happening right now.

I zoned out once we took off. I didn't know if he was talking to me on the way there, all I could think about was my baby, and if something was wrong.

I couldn't lose it, not now, not that I was completely attached and in love with him or her. Besides my own feelings, I couldn't lose it because it would destroy Harry.

I'd feel like a failure, like I would be taking something away from him. I'd blame myself for losing this baby, like I could have done something better or been more cautious.

"Jen, baby come on," Harry was standing at my passenger door, waiting for me to exit the car.

I looked to him, and his were glassy and red, and his cheeks were fresh with tears.

I couldn't go in there for them to tell me the baby was gone, I couldn't do that to him. I didn't want to move, I just wanted this to be a nightmare I would wake up from any second now.

"Jen please, I know you don't want to talk to me but please get out of the car," he pleaded with me.

"It's not that Harry," I began to cry again. I seemed to be doing a lot of that tonight. From when we got back to his house, to seeing the blood, to right now. I was surprised I wasn't dehydrated by now.

"Then what is it?" He leaned into the car, resting one hand on the headrest behind me, and the other pulling by chin to turn me to face him.

"I don't want to go in there for them to tell me the baby is gone. I don't want to disappoint you," I broke our eye contact and closed my eyes.

"Jenelle, no matter what happens in there, I would never be disappointed in you. I would hate myself for what I put you through tonight, which clearly is the reason for what is happening right now! Please just come inside so we can see what's happening," he reached over and undid my seat belt, then helped me out the car.

I wouldn't blame him for the worst happening, I shouldn't have said what I did, he had every right to be mad.

We got to reception and Harry explained to the nurse what was happening, and she put us as priority.

"No matter what happens, I love you and we'll deal with this together okay?" He looked intensely into my eyes.

"Okay," I nodded, and he kissed me before pulling me tightly into him, not letting me go until the doctor called for us.

...

"Why couldn't they just do another bloody ultrasound? They're running all these tests when they could just get the thing up on the screen and see if there's a heartbeat!" Harry was growing annoyed with this wait, and I was feeling about the same way.

These doctors couldn't tell me anything until they got my blood and urine results back, leaving us to anxiously wait to see if our child was still with us or not.

The bleeding had stopped, I was hoping that was a good sign at least.

"It's okay babe, I'm sure they're doing the best they can," I tried to calm him. There was no use in both of us being a mess right now, it wouldn't help anything.