Obsidian & Bronze {Fred Weasley}

44. The weakness of the winning

"No, no, no. I don't think you understand. This is ridiculous Hermione" I exclaimed, pacing frantically across the common room, my head filling slowly with a buzz like the static on a TV, and my heart hammering so violently I'm surprised I could be heard over its volume.

"I've already spoken to Dumbledore-" Hermione attempted to reason, standing up off the couch and following me across the room, a regretful and worried looking swimming in her eyes, taking over her features.

"I don't give a fuck what Dumbledore says" I snapped spitfully, and Hermione took a few paces back at the entrance of my violent tone.

I watched her features fall, the slight quiver of her lips, the unsteadiness of her stance and immediately regretted the intrusion of my temper. "Sorry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped" I apologised immediately, walking over and taking her hands in mine.

"It's fine. Look, I didn't want to hurt you, I just- you deserve this more than I do. Or at least you want it for the right reasons" Hermione sighed, her chest deflated as she stepped back and fell onto the couch, sinking into it.

"Hermione, just because you think that, doesn't mean you should have gone to Dumbledore and given up your space for head girl for me" I sighed, dropping into the sofa next to her.

"Maybe not. But I have, and I want you to take it. Go and make everyone proud. Prove you can do this. I know you can"

*****

"And lastly, there has been a slight adjustment of the candidates as after much deliberation amongst the facility we have agreed that as per Miss Grangers wishes, Ardelle Lupin-Black will be taking her position" Professor Mcgonagall announced across the great hall, filling the room with an uneasy chatter.

The entire school had filed into the hall, Draco, Pansy and Cedric all back seated at their house tables, whilst I stood, legs weak and nimble, hands shaking and numb, behind Dumbledore's podium, waiting to present my speech to the school.

I physically felt my heart rattle against my chest, like a caged bird begging to be freed, and my throat burnt with the fear that I would open my mouth and no words would proceed.

I looked down at the parchment below me, my speech scribbled across it, my hands shaking so violently that the words blurred and melted together, my clarity slipping away with each passing second that I stood there.

I took a deep lingering breath and glanced up at the door, my breathing faltering the second I caught his gaze, and had it not been for his smile I would have thought my eyes deceived me, and yet I knew in the moment he had never been more real.

Fred Weasley stood, lingering in the doorway, his large frame leisurely leaning against the frame and he crossed his arms over his chest, a warming grin wiped across his face so wide that his eyes had started to crinkled around the edges.

'You've got this' He mouthed, running a hand through his rugged and messy hair and breathing steadily like he purposefully wanted to remind me how.

Every nerve had everapoted, the thick tension seemingly slipping away as I glanced up at him for a final time, my heart warm and bubbly in my stomach, my hands not so shaky anymore.

"For my entire life I've only ever viewed myself as three things. An orphan. An inconvenience. And someone who will forever remain very very lost. My biggest competitor, the person always rooting against me and my every move, that has always been me. No one has ever hated myself more than I have, no one has believed in me less than I have" I was suddenly regretting this vast exposure of vulnerability, but that smile at the end of the hall reassured me against it.