I love you [cm oneshots]

28

Anxious Spencer looks down on the kid in front of him handing him his breakfast, "I am sorry it isn't what your dad always makes."

"You made pancakes! I love pancakes!" Jack tells him, his voice filled with excitement. "Thank you Spencer"

"It's not what you usual eat."

"I don't mind" Sceptical Spencer eyes him but then let's him eat breakfast in peace while he packs Jack's lunchbox. "You need one too."

"What do you mean?"

"For work. Dad always takes one to work for you and him."

"Right." Uncomfortable Spencer reaches down to the drawer pulling out another one.

"Are you okay, Spencer?" The boy questions furrowing his eyebrows.

"Yes I am fine." He lies, shooting Jack a quick smile. "I am just gonna go to the bathroom for a second."

"Can you bring me my juice when you get back?" Jack asks looking up to him. Spencer in the beginning had found it intimidating that Jack would try looking into his eyes with such dedication. The team is used to him not making eye contact most of the time but against Hotch's countless offers he forces himself with Jack.

"I will."

"Thank you!" The moment he leaves the kitchen tears start running down his face and he quickly rushes into the bathroom, trying to wipe them away and to imagine Aaron's voice talking him through this.

How he would tell him to take a deep breathe, how he would tell him to wash his face with cold water, how he would tell him everything is going to be alright and how he would just silently walk behind Spencer.

"I picked grape fruit juice is that okay?" Spencer asks the boy timidly.

"It's my favorite!"

"Oh can I pack it- should I pack this in your backpack?" He questions.

"Yes please" Jack watches Spencer put in, before thanking him with a bright smile. "I love you getting me ready for school because it's always special and different."

"I am sorry it's different." Nervously Spencer sways back and forth on his feet while hitting his thigh with his fist, hoping Jack doesn't see him doing it behind the counter. "You have a  very large variety of morning routines."

"You don't." Jack points out and slips of the chair carrying his plate over to Spencer. "I am gonna go wash my hands and mouth."

"You can do that." With shaking hands he accepts the plate, thinking the boy is oblivious to his distress. "Do you need help with that?"

"No" While Jack is gone he quickly throws his own breakfast into the trash and shoves Jack's lunchbox into his backpack holding the backpack out for Jack to take when he comes back. "I need my jacket first or is it warm enough?"

"Oh no you definitely need a jacket first. And shoes." He points out and accommodates Jack to the door where he quickly gets into both and then takes his helmet, clipping it shut underneath his chin which makes Spencer cringe ever since he accidentally caught Jack's skin in the clasp once. "There you go."

"Thank you."

"You are welcome." Spencer opens the door for him, letting him through. "Drive safely"

"I will" Jack walks towards his bike before he turns around, "I almost forgot." and runs back hugging Spencer tightly when the man crouches down before kissing Spencer on the nose.

"Oh, thank you." Spencer stammers out.

"Will you be here this afternoon?"

"Jessica is going to be there."

"Okay, then till tonight?"

"I hope so, monkey." Jack quickly hugs him again and then hurries towards his bike when he sees his friend waiting on them. "Have fun at school."

"I will! Thank you,Spencer!" When Spencer walks into Hotch's hospital bed not even half an hour later the man is quick to place a hand on his cheek stroking up and down with his thump.

"Thank you" He whispers, having his eyes closed due the exhaustion of the surgery he went through last night after being shot by an UNSUB. "Is Jack okay?"

"I don't know."

"What did you tell him?" Hotch questions.

"That you are working. I am sorry. I didn't know how to tell him."

"It's okay, I am proud of you. You did good."

"I messed everything up." Spencer insist, a tear running down his face as Morgan steps in. "I messed up his whole morning routine."

"Baby why don't you let Morgan take care of you? Go with him." Spencer's head snaps up, seeing Morgan standing in the doorway and then he looks down on his husband, laying there, machines keeping him alive and he is pulled back into the uncomfortable reality that this is something Hotch can't help him through. That Hotch this time won't hold him through his fears and insecurity.

"Kid?" Slowly Morgan steps in. "It's okay, he will be okay, but we gotta make sure you are too." Hesitant he holds his hand out for Spencer to take, knowing it will spend him comfort. "We will drive home again and I will help you okay? You did an amazing job with getting Jack to school"

Distraught Spencer grabs Morgan's hand not daring to let his eyes of Hotch and when he does he can swear he heard him whisper again.

"It's okay kid, you need some sleep, you are okay-"

"He is gonna die."

"He is not gonna die." Morgan tells him, rubbing his thumb over the back of Spencer's hand. "He is gonna wake up again and until then, you have a child who needs you more than ever before."