I love you [cm oneshots]

80

"That is a sight I did not expect to see tonight." Derek greats the group, commenting on the cocktail in front of Spencer. He had shyly asked Derek this morning that if he would go with JJ, Emily and Garcia on a girls night to make Emily feel welcome in her new team, if Derek could pick him up later because he doesn't want to take the subway or a cab this late.

"I see you are having fun." He speaks into the round. Spencer had texted him twenty minutes ago, informing him that he is ready to be picked up.

"Oh we are." JJ announces and then leans closer, "Someone had maybe a cocktail to much tonight" pointing at Spencer who just sits there, having a smile on his face as he is lost in thoughts.

"Thanks for the heads up." Derek walks to the other side of the table, placing a hand on Spencer's shoulder that he quickly with a "no touching me" shrugs off and then looks up to Derek, but instead of how he usually looks up to him he dares to just completely avoid Morgan's face. "You ready to head out?"

Spencer nods and lets his hand slip of the cold glass grabbing his jacket from behind him, not really noticing when Derek helps him into it. "I am sorry."

"For what?" Morgan questions concerned looking down on him.

"For being drunk."

"Hey! None of that. It's okay. I told you I don't mind driving you home tonight, believe me I knew that included a drunk pretty boy."

"Oh" Spencer slips out and then he waves to the group, them thanking him for the fun night before he walks out with Derek. They stay close to each other until Spencer stumbles over his own feet and Derek wraps an arm around him, steadying him. "Sorry"

"No need to be sorry. Is it okay if I hold you like this?"

"No hurting me."

"I would never hurt you." He promises and leads them towards his car, "In with you" with a warm smile he holds the door open and Spencer climbs inside the truck, being surprised by the weight of his own limbs when he falls to the side. "I've got you." 

Derek steps onto the first step, waiting for Spencer to find his coordination again and then he starts flapping his hands, Derek has seen him doing that but normally he would have cut it off immediately. "You good?"

"Very. I am also drunk."

"That's okay, I promise. Watch your hands I am gonna close the door okay?"

"Yes." He steps down and waits for a moment, checking if Spencer is gonna be okay and then closes the door hurrying around the car with a chuckle. This is gonna be a fun night. "Alright, is your seatbelt on?"

Guilty Spencer shakes his head and goes for it, having a hard time buckling it up, making Morgan crack into a smile before he reaches for it to do it for him, when he sees Spencer pouting. "What is it? Come on it's no shame in that." He nudges Spencer's nose, earning himself the privilege to be the reason Spencer lets out a noise that Derek is sure he has never heard from him while he flaps his hands again.

"I am gonna drive you home now okay?"

"Mmm" Spencer nods and leans back against the seat. Appreciating how he can catch a minute of quiet, his ears feeling like they can finally for the first time rest today.

Morgan notices Spencer humming but doesn't comment on it and just gives him quiet while driving to Spencer's apartment.

"Alright, party boy. Out with you." He tells him standing at his side. "I am gonna walk you up if that's okay with you?"

"If that's okay with you? Very." Morgan has noticed him having troubles with words but the first time he really noticed was when Spencer saw a dead child for the first time and went non verbal for the rest of the day and after that for a few days was also not really able to form his own sentences.

Morgan back then had thought this was only a response to the trauma that comes with it, he had been hardly 23 when it happened but now he thinks the pieces are falling together and internally he blames himself for not noticing sooner.

"Hand?" Morgan offers when Spencer goes to get out of the truck.

"Didn't wash my hand yet."

"I don't mind" Hesitant Spencer takes it and jumps out smiling at Morgan when the man protectively reaches forward to keep him from accidentally hitting his head against the door, "You good?"

"Good"

"Alright, lead the way." Spencer doesn't let go of his hand, pulls him into the apartment complex and up the old stairs, only a very few lights still functioning. "This isn't safe."

"It's always this way." Spencer excuses and leds them into the apartment where books are stacked everywhere, paper shattered near the couch, a few cups standing around. There are clothes folded and piled up in the hallway and groceries still on the kitchen counter. "You like it?"

"It suits you very much."

"Thank you." Spencer tells him with an wide honest grin and then walks towards a little notebook on his table opening it. "First Step: Bathroom."

"What?" Derek questions and Spencer walks over to him, handing him the notebook. "Is this your night time routine?" He tries keeping the tone as non judgmental as possible as he reads over the very detailed plan, when Spencer nods. "Okay why don't we skip this today? Just get you dressed in pajamas."

"No"

"No?"

"This is my nighttime routine, I can't skip that" With that Spencer stumbles forward again, leaning against Morgan. "Hi"

Morgan snorts ones looking down on him, "We had a lot of cocktails didn't we?"

"Yes" Spencer grabs the book back and walks towards his bathroom and Morgan listens carefully at the door, making sure he isn't drowning in his shower and eventually there is quiet and he knocks first but not response so he goes in to find Spencer sitting on the floor, dressed in his underwear, "What's going on, pretty boy?"

Without a word Spencer points at his wet hair.

"What's with that?"

"Hate touching it." He twitches at the thought of that and Derek thinks back to how Spencer hates touching wet things. "Just gonna need some time."

"Nah you gonna need to get to bed, let me help you." Derek walks over and grabs the blow dryer from the shelve while Spencer just stares at him. "Not a good idea?"

"It is a good idea."

"So scoop over a bit." Derek sits down on the bathtub behind him, chuckling when Spencer leans his head against his thigh. "Guess we are gonna do the other side first then."

When he turns the blow dryer on, Spencer is quick to cover his ear with his hand while the other plays with Morgan's shoelaces until Derek gently moves his hand between his head and his own thigh and leans him against his other to dry the other half of his hair.

"This was quick." Spencer states when he slips into bed.

"Your nighttime routine?"

"Mhmm." Derek grabs the two blankets on the bed, covering him with it and then sits down next to him on the bed. "Thank you, Morgan."

"Is that something you do every night?"

"Yes"

"Why?"

"I don't like changes in my routine." He states closing his eyes.

"But why?"

"It makes me feel safer. Gideon says-" He yawns ones, "Many autistic people do." There it is.

Gently Morgan reaches up to his head wiping the hair back ones before getting up, "I am gonna be on the couch okay?"

He doesn't get an answer but when he in the morning is used as a weighted blanket, cuddling entirely onto Spencer only his blankets separating him while Spencer's giggle fill the room because he hasn't felt this safe in a long time, Derek maybe just signed his entire heart up to doing this regularly.